A few friends

Wah I was looking in my drafts for any unfinished posts that I could take up and post and came across this:

kathy says:
u have such little friends! all your photos are with angie, cheesie or ur bf or family.

That’s all wtf.

Apparently this Kathy, being very presumptuous in her position as blog reader with no actual contact to me, felt certain enough in her assumption to leave this comment.

She don’t know me in person, never mind!  She doesn’t see what I do everyday, how many people I may meet or don’t meet, never mind!  She still believes enough in her assumption to say this.

I can’t tell whether she meant to be insulting or not but give her benefit of the doubt la ok.

My  friends are not just my family, Fatty, Angie and Cheesie la of course hahahaha.  Not so loner ok.

timaud-30-1Hello friends!

I didn’t pay them to be in this picture with me ok WTF.

Kathy, just because I don’t post their pictures as often or don’t tag them on Twitter does not mean I don’t have other people in my life who I meet and talk to regularly and go through life with.

It just means that I’ve grown out of the phase in my life where I have to document every single thing I do or every single person I meet.

When I was younger, every single outing was a reason for dressing up and snapping photos.  Also because the people I was friends with (Angela and Mild) had their cameras surgically attached to them and would take photos of everything hahaha.  Not complaining, cos I love taking photos too.

But as I grow older, I guess I’ve lost that compulsion.  I wasn’t very camera-prone before so now that my friends around me have also outgrown it, I’ve forgotten about documenting outings even more.

(also because the person I’m with the most, Fatty, takes the most horrendous photos of me wtf.  I think I’m generally quite photogenic EXCEPT in all Fatty’s pictures.  So I’ve given up asking him to take pictures of me.)

I don’t know.  It just doesn’t seem that important anymore and to be honest I can’t figure out why either.  Is it because I’ve gotten less vain?  Less preoccupied with myself and more interested in what I do than documenting it?  Or is it that going out with my friends is no big deal anymore (because I’m an adult ahem) and I can go out anytime I want wtf.

I only remember when I see younger girls’ blogs and they’re all filled with like fifty photos of one dinner or one party (twenty of them will be of their own face) and I’d be like Oh yea I used to do that too.  Hahaha.

That said, Kathy is right too because if I compare my friends (the ones I catch up with on a regular basis or talk to on messaging apps) now to the friends I had before when I was in college I think they’re ten times less now wtf.

So!  What happened to my parents is now happening to me!

When I was in school (and especially when I came home for summer vacation) I’d meet up with a different friend everyday wtf.  Right now I only have a handful of friends that I really make effort to stay in touch with and go to for everything,  and they’re all girls wtf.

Yea the only guy friends I have are Fatty’s friends… or my friends’ boyfriends.

When I was younger besides four or five close girl friends, the rest of my friends were guys wtf.  Dunno why it just seemed easier to hang out with guys and less pressuring.  (Don’t talk about Mount Holyoke of course all my friends there were female wtf.)  Maybe I needed some gender balance so most of my friends in Malaysia were male.

Then somewhere along the way I started preferring the company of girls more.  My guy friends also all got attached and moved on with their lives and it turned out to be not so nice anymore if I go catch a movie with them randomly.  And there were just more things to share with girls anyway!

And then… we got older and busier.  And the busier I got, the less time I had for friends.  So what little time I had I made sure I spent it with people who really mattered.  I do miss the people I’ve drifted apart from/don’t see so often anymore but that’s what I have to do or else I’d never get anything done wtf.  Not sure if it’s like this for everyone else but it’s the same for Fatty too.  At some point he also realized he preferred hanging out with all guys, and he only bothered to make time for the people who mattered the most to him.

That’s really enough for us.  It’s the quality that counts, not quantity. 😀

So Kathy whoever you are, I’d guess you’re probably really young. (and probably quite judgmental lol).  Give it a few years and you’ll see.




  • Yuki

    Lawl. You’re right. A few close friends and loved ones whom you can trust is more than enough. Siao kathy.

  • Shian

    Hi Audrey! Totally agree with u, as we grow older we will treasure quality friendships rather than quantity.

  • elaine

    I totally agree! I think college is just a different universe than after college, after growing up all your friends might not be in the same place anymore and between working and everything, there’s not that much free time to meet with so many people besides a dinner here and there!

  • samantha

    hahaha, the “pay them to be in the picture with [you]” comment really made me lol. So how much did you pay each bridesmaid? 😛

  • Mandie

    Quality over quantity if you ask me. I’d rather have a few close friends that I be completely myself around then many acquaintances.

  • mq

    I’m totally agree with what you said. As we grow older, we tend to think differently compared to youngsters. We became more selective in making with friends. =) Quality is better than quantity!

  • Irene

    I’m only 21 and I’m already pushing away my friends.. I thought I was abnormal hahaha

  • mq

    *in making friends

  • Ilnov

    Totally agreed with you! As i’m already stepped into adult road, i tend to spend more moments with the one that mattered to me most; my closest friends and my boyfie. quality over quantity!

  • Eunice GM

    totally agree! lol.

  • pikapikh

    I’m 20 now and I’m having similar phase like yours, Aud. I think now we don’t bother to snap photos and all can be bcos we meet our friends very often or we’ve been friends for so long that we’ve grown bored of camwhoring haha. Anyways, agree with your statements that now, we’ll just spare times to those who really matter..

  • TianChad

    Well, I would say it is the needs of balancing after facing husband/wife for so long and see each other almost everyday. The needs for balance of male/female interaction I guess?n

  • Melissa Tham

    When you are single, you will have plenty of friends. Cos they are single too. nBut when you are married…the friends quantity has reduced, bcos many of them are married as well. And the worst part is…when ppl got into parenthood…lesser friends. Most of the time, they will spend with their children. So, whats left are the real friends I guess. ;-)nCHEERS Audrey 😉

  • k

    When I first read Kathy’s comment, I thought she meant all your friends are tiny and short and cute and I wondered why you were offended cause it was true wth. nBut it’s true – the older you get, the less friends you have. But the more valuable the ones you keep. Currently in college and hanging out with only the boyfriend and housemates. I’m already well on my way to being a lao niang =___=

  • Fourfeetnine

    Haha that doesn’t make sense. If she meant my friends are tiny she wouldn’t mention my family and husband!

  • urban-piggy

    agree with what you’ve said! I only take photo of outings if it’s special occasions. I used to take photos and document every single outings. I thought it’s only me!

  • ohfishiee

    lol no picture means no friends? then her way of defining friends should be “people who love taking pictures with me”. But I wonder how many of these people who appear in the photos are really the ones that we can count on… You’re right Aud, people lead separate lives after college years, but hearts remain intact 🙂

  • Lynn Ng

    This is officially my fav post! <3

  • J_Fish

    If I’m Kathy I would feel very honoured because you wrote a blogpost because of her comment. XD I feel like I should leave a mean comment and maybe I’ll get a post specially for me. *rubs hands while thinking of mean but helpful comment*

  • Mandy Faith

    I truly agree to what you say, Audrey! Making many many new friends now seems so much less important. Quality over quantity 🙂 I enjoy seeing pictures of you and your hubby/ Cheesie very much though 😛

  • ally

    cannot brain why you would dedicate a blog post on something petty like this…nso what if you only have so little friends? nothing to be ashamed off… nn

  • Fourfeetnine

    Well I think I said that I wasn’t sure if Kathy meant to be insulting so I guess you didn’t get it but its not meant to be a post refuting her comment.nnI blogged about it because I thought it was interesting to let younger readers know that something like this may happen to them as well and to readers my age, to let them know that this is happening to me too. nnIf this was supposed to be a “petty” post id have tagged it AudAngry lo.

  • Fourfeetnine

    Hahahaha funny! I didn’t write this post FOR her. nnIn a way I was inspired by her comment. I noticed the change in my habits as well so this was a good reason for me to document this change in my blog. 🙂

  • august

    hehe.. this is so true! your blog describe me as well and my current state… i guess we have the same perception!

  • yezi

    Ya, I just have same thoughts with u. Spending time with people who really mattered..

  • aud’s friend

    ya la why you never brain properly before dedicate this post? nnwe will never lose touch my love /clutches

  • Michelle

    That’s sign of one growing out of little girl phase. Becoming a woman

  • SingleByDesign

    What you said is so true. Its the quality of friendship, not the quantity that counts. Coz they are the friends who are with you through thick and thin.

  • fee

    Heyo. Why does it seem like after u and cheeserland got married, both blog about finding things to blog about. Maybe when I do get married I will be the same. Haha. Regardless, still think your life is eventful. You are pretty awesome. A malaysian who speaks jap. I want to learn jap but keep procrastinating. Btw, ive just started reading your blog. Im not one to comment on peoples blog, but just thought I should try. So hi! Pls blog more . Thanks.

  • 013

    Oh Audrey, I can’t tell you how correct you are in this post.nnMy boyfriend is more than 5 years told me this would happen to me too, because when he first met me I had so many “friends” and slowly they started disappearing, whether over petty fights or mostly because we are all just too busy with our own things!nnLife, it is!

  • ericsoong

    dammit i didnt make the cut T_T

  • Fourfeetnine

    Idiot hahahahahahha

  • Fourfeetnine

    Yup Tim told me the same haha

  • Fourfeetnine

    Learn ah! Always good to pick up a new skill

  • m ! ss Y

    totally agree with you =) spend time with people who matter the most.