What I’m thankful for

Update!  I’m still in the hospital wtf.  With no sign of being able to leave. T___T

Preeclampsia is a progressive condition so my blood pressure has been steadily increasing. D:  When I was first admitted, it was about 130/90 and now without medication it’s up to 180/110. D:  I’ve also started getting headaches which are another symptom and more nose bleeds which the nurses say is cause of the high BP.

Doctor is still titrating the drug dosage to figure out what’s a stabilizing figure since my BP is still super unstable.  So I guess I’m stuck here for the time being.

Being in the hospital for a week now, I’ve obviously had a lot of time to think.  For the past couple of days I think  I was also emotionally quite unstable; every time my BP reading came back high I’d start crying and poor Fatty would have to comfort me.  But maybe now I’m used to it already.  160? Oh ok *continues watching Modern Family

But like I said, I had a lot of time to think.  And I think despite all this I still consider myself quite lucky la!!

1.  I’m very popular WTF.  No la I mean very loved hahahah.  I’ve been here a week and everyday got people come to visit, or at least calling/texting to check how I am!  Thank you so much everyone you know who you are.  It really does distract me and makes me feel better!

Untitled

These balloons in particular from Bobo & Jo, and Lay See & Pierre.

Untitled

2. All the caring messages from readers on social media and email and everything

Mummy Ooi was very worried about me blogging about this; she worried that it was pantang (taboo) because haters might be happy with the misfortune that had befallen us and wish us further ill.  But it was important to me to blog about this because… I wanna document this la for the future.  And everyone has been so overwhelmingly caring and supportive I’m glad I did!  I haven’t had time to reply your comments and emails but I have been reading all and I just wanna thank you guys for cheering me up and being so supportive!

Sometimes on bad days I look at comments that say they had preeclampsia at like 36 weeks and delivered and everything is ok, and feel resentful cos 36 or 37 weeks is perfectly safe and if I was at 36 weeks myself I would be so happy already.  All we want is to get Fighter to 34 weeks now!!!  But that’s just me in a bad frame of mind and I know that people are just trying to comfort me.  So thank you all!  I really do appreciate your comments and for making us feel not alone. :)

3.  At least Fighter is 29 weeks now.

It could be worse.  He could be even younger and therefore even more fragile!  29 weeks is still dangerous, but with today’s technology, babies born at 29-30 weeks have a very high chance of survival and while there’s a chance of short term and mid term problems, the incidence of long term disabilities is still better than if he was younger.

I still think I’m immortal wtf so I didn’t think too much about myself but I’m terrified that Fighter will have physical or intellectual disabilities I don’t think I could stand it. T______T But we just keep reminding ourselves that it could be worse.

4.  I have an awesome husband

Say before la hahaha.  But I’m so thankful that Fatty has been so strong about this and I can lean on him.  He’s super optimistic about things too.  And best of all, I think  our relationship has actually gotten even stronger and that we’re good for each other in times of crisis.

Untitled

It was our first year wedding anniversary last Saturday!

Untitled

We were hoping to get home leave to go out for dinner for a few hours but my BP spiked that night so it was a no-no. D:  Fatty showed up at my bedside with flowers though as a surprise. T3T

5.  We can afford the bills

Some nights I cannot sleep cos I’m fretting over the piling costs wtf.  But at least we can still pay la as opposed to news articles of people you see who ask for donations for operations and stuff. T3T

6.  It was detected early

I think we were quite lucky we detected it quite early when it was quite moderate!  Imagine if we didn’t and something went horribly wrong!  Like I had a stroke wtf or Fighter’s development was seriously affected.  At least now we know and are taking measures to counter it.

7. Can see Fighter earlier!

Obviously if can I wanna wait till the bun is fully cooked before taking it out of the oven wtf but you have to take what you can get.

And one of the best parts (barring Fighter being unwell of course) is that we get to see him earlier than expected!!!  Confirm he will be here by 34 weeks can only hope he stays in as long as that.

Untitled

Last week’s ultrasound scan of him.  Hemsem or not hahahaha.

Untitled

And this is a picture of a preemie baby Suet showed me.  Chilling in its incubator HAHAHAHA DAMN CUTE.  Pillow pattern looks like disco lights some more then wearing shades hahahaha too much.

This photo gives me hope that Fighter will be fine. :)

This entry was posted in AudBaby, AudSappy. Bookmark the permalink.

93 Responses to What I’m thankful for

  1. MichelleChan says:

    Praying for you and your baby. Cheering you and Fighter on! Lots of hugs from your silent reader.

  2. chien says:

    I wish you and fighter all the luck and health!! Stay strong and take care! n-your silent reader for years-

  3. Suz says:

    You guys are an inspiration! There are sure things behind the scene that you do not mention here, but if I were you, I’d probably break down so much. It’s really inspiring to see someone so small getting through this predicament with a positive attitude! I’m inches taller than you but I don’t think I’m as tough as you are!nI do hope Fighter comes up to 34 weeks in mummy’s womb! There is really a lot to be thankful for, Audrey! I hear that it is actually quite common for miscarriages *choi* to happen to first child’s, and you’re so good that you carry up to 30 weeks!nI’ll be praying some more for you!

  4. Anonymous says:

    although I have been reading your blog for ages, this is my first time ever commenting!!nnStay strong and I hope that these few weeks will fly by! I’m rooting for Fighter! Cant wait to see him on the blog! Remember you are surrounded by those who really love you and you’ll get through anything with them!

  5. viruspadu says:

    Stay strong. Praying for you and Fighter. Take care cute Audrey :)

  6. Voomei says:

    Praying for you! Stay strong! Everything is going to be alright. :)

  7. Anonymous says:

    Timothy & you are such sweet & kind couple.. nGod will definitely blessed both you with a healthy & strong fighter..nFyi, im a premature baby.. Borne 3 months earlier, weighing 1kg or less (I cant rem)nMy height & size is definitely not on the losing end :p :p :pnnFighting! Fighting!

  8. Cassie says:

    Dearest Audrey, I have been reading for the longest time and i always don’t know what to comment (I typed and deleted it before sending everytime because I don’t know and worried if its appropriate etc HAHA) although I love every post of yours. But today, I really want to tell you that I hope everything will be alright for you and the baby. I’ll be praying for you and Fighter! You and Tim are such an inspirational couple that it touches my hear very much. nAll the best to you and take care!nnXoxonFrom your no-longer-silent-reader :)

  9. Mel H. says:

    Dear Audrey my prayers for u and ur little one. Hang in there tough Mama!

  10. goingkookies says:

    Hi Audrey.. have been following your blog and Tim’s for ages and never tire reading both your heartfelt and super cute posts! Have actually met you both at MACC (the comedy show) and Nuffnang movie screenings but shy to say hello.. I also dunno why so shy.. but anyways…nnFrom what I’ve heard, pregnancy isn’t easy and what more to say complications like yours. There will be days where everything just seems dark, gloomy and hopeless but hang in there k.. nnYou are fortunate that you are surrounded by many people who care and love you.. when times get tougher, try to remind yourself that and be as strong as you can for your little Fighter ya! nnLots of HUGS and I will pray hard for you, Tim and little Fighter as you weather this storm together. Stay cute, too!!

  11. km says:

    All the best Audrey! I’m glad your doctor is monitoring you closely. Will keep fingers crossed!

  12. Mel says:

    Hi Audrey, I’ve been following your blog for a while but never leave any comments, just dunno what to say. Kinda feel like silent stalker. You are such a funny and optimistic girl. When I have a bad day, your blog never fail to make me smile. Stay strong, my thought and prayers are with you, Tim and Fighter. There will be times when your feeling is at the lowest but stay positive (which I think you already have). The only way is up!!! :) nMel

  13. Aileen says:

    Take care Audrey! I’ll be rooting for you & keeping u in my prayers! :)

  14. Hunnie says:

    Stay strong Audrey, you and fighter will make it through!

  15. Zilly.m says:

    Hi Audrey. Start reading ur blog since U were in uni but nvr left comments before. Will pray for u & fighter and hope everything will be fine :) have a lil faith!

  16. fax2jamie says:

    Hi Aud the sweet mom to be. Have been your silent reader for years. I think I’m one of your more matured n old blog reader… Hehe.. Well just want to wish you get well soon and be strong. I had 2 little ones and went thru 2 miscarriages prior to my 2 kids. Had super high blood pressure too during pregnancy n both my babies were born at 36 & 34 weeks respectively. I believe you n fighter will make it through n having all the support from your ever loving husband, families n friends are the best motivator to overcome any difficult times. Gambate Aud & fighter!

  17. Anonymous says:

    hi aud, i know how worrying it is. i had an operation when i was pregnant at 29 weeks. i was so terrified then, worried the anesthetic and the antibiotics that was given to me will harm my baby in any way. i am a worrier by nature si this takes the cake! my daughter is now 5 and she is happy n healthy. nnstay positive and i am rooting for u and fighter! :-)

  18. Jackie says:

    I have my fingers crossed that you and fighter will be safe and healthy! You’re tough and that means fighter will be too, so I’m sure you’re both going to be just fine! Hang in there!!!

  19. SueAnne Koh says:

    Start a conversation…

  20. ting ting says:

    gambatte !!! :D you are doing so great !!!

  21. Wy says:

    Believe fighter will be fine! Get well soon fourfeetnine! :) n

  22. shao says:

    My prayers for you and your baby! You n young Tim will be fine, im sure. On the bright side, you know that you had the mental support you need frm your husband =) Good Luck!

  23. Irene says:

    I’m keeping you in my prayers! You’ll be fine one because everyone is praying for you! :D nRelax and stay strong! :D DDDDDD

  24. Moon says:

    Believe fighter will be fine :) get well soon ^^ fighting !!!!

  25. Dayana says:

    Hope everything goes well for u and the baby!! Get well soon!!

  26. Gina says:

    Get well soon!!

  27. Winny says:

    I usually never comment but..nnFighting audrey!! Know that all of us, your reader will always support you whatever your condition right now. Be patient and Hopefully you will have a very smooth and safe birth. can’t wait to see you and fatty’s son, Fighter!^^nTake care audreyy oiiii, Fighting yo!! wtf. hahah

  28. Bev says:

    I love reading ur blog the most although u’re a few yrs younger than me n I’m a Singaporean.nnAnyway 1st time commenting here n wanted to say ur recent posts brought tears in my eyes and were heart wrenching. As in I dunno u in person but I do feel concerned for u.nnDon’t worry abt pantangness cos I bliv many more ppl are wishing well for u n would overcome any bad luck, like me! :)

  29. Jiahui Seah says:

    Hi Audrey :) rnrnWhen the going gets tough, Audrey gets going! Dont give up! :) I pray that you and fighter will be fine! You’re my favourite blogger and everyone here loves you! rnrnP.S. You’re doing so GREAT in everything :)

  30. julian says:

    Just to wish you strength, hope and patience. It must be very tough for you all. Touching wood for you and Fighter.

  31. ailin says:

    Audrey cont to keep ur spirits up! fighter will be very proud to have such strong and loving mum and dad! jiayou! :)

  32. ahlost says:

    keep on fighting Audrey.. not sure if you’re out from hospital.. but remember to take very good care of yourself and baby too :)

  33. Michelle says:

    Aud, hang in there – you are very loved, even by people who have never met you irl (did that come out sounding creepy ar wtf) nAnd Fighter, stay in there as long as you can – trust me, you have top-notch digs!nSending positive vibes your wayn

  34. Carmen says:

    Hey wk 29 is ending… Soon wk 30 will b over n wk 31 n with no time it will b wk 34 already okay…:). So don’t think about it… Keep urself busy and time will fly by very quickly… Just talk to fighter thy can feel u alrite… Tell him to relax and it’s not time yet… He will chill inside n you chill outside as well ok… Best wishes hugss

  35. jingyingsia says:

    keep on fighting, you and fighter will be alright!! be optimistic! I will pray for you. take good care audrey

  36. Gabby says:

    Hello Audrey! nnI guess it’s time for me to write a comment naooo after being just a vivid reader =]nAlways thought “eh one more person commenting will make a diff meh wtf..” but i’ll take my chances hoping you’d read this! I’m a nurse and have seen so much but no use sharing experiences because every story has different and unique circumstances. nHaving said that, I wish you and Fatty all the very best! Take care and we shall see Fighter soon!

  37. chilicandy says:

    Hi Audrey ! nDidn’t realize what you were going through until i read this. I sincerely hope you and fighter will emerge the victor. And i somehow felt you being a mom already have this sixth sense when you nickname the baby ‘fighter’. You are gonna see him through this, and he will receive your strength as well. nFight on ! Wish you well !

  38. Olivia says:

    One of my best friends was 2 and a half months premature and he’s ok! And now he is like super smart (top in his class, doing dentistry) and multi-talented! Maybe this isnt what you want to hear, but thought I’d share anyway. I have faith that both you and fighter will be ok. Stay strong and best of luck :)

  39. Audrey says:

    Hi Audrey! Just want to wish you and your Fatty all the best through this ordeal. I’m sure things will start to look up soon :) It’s great to hear that you both are being strengthened by this ordeal, and I’m sure you’ll be the best parents your baby could ever have. Don’t lose hope!

  40. Anonymous says:

    Dearest Audrey, wishing you all the best to you, Tim and baby fighter! Praying that your condition gets better. Love from, your reader from Singapore!

  41. Ally says:

    Hi Audrey, Keep Calm and CARRY on! Everything will turn out peachy fine, just hang in there. I know how it feels to be hanging on and praying hard for your baby, though I didn’t have preeclampsia, I went through something else that were similarly alarming. MOTHERS ARE SO STRONG YA! You’ll be an awesome mom :) nLuv, silent reader from JB

  42. Molly says:

    gambateh Audrey! Keep your spirits up! Will pray for u and fighter! Look fwd to receive the GOOODDD news…Cheers! :D

  43. Ing says:

    Hi Audrey! Gambateh! Get well soon, my prayers are with you and your baby!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>