Today’s lesson learned: as soon as you get home, change into your oldest, moldiest tshirt and shorts. Your laundry will thank you for it.
So… Fighter was being relatively cheerful and easy today. Took his milk quietly, burped well and stayed asleep with little to no groaning or grunting.
Until the afternoon, that is.
On the dot, he woke up yelling for his afternoon feed. So ok, I scooped him up and went upstairs to feed him.
He was drinking his milk… but he was also squirming around and sort of squealing (in frustration??) around the nipple. Squirmed until he came off the breast and he was still making frustrated sounds – unusual cos he’s usually super quiet when drinking. I tried giving him the nipple again but he yanked his head away so I thought okay maybe it’s time for a diaper change.
Carried him to the changing table and peeked into his diaper. Yay mommy instincts he did poop!
Carried him to the sink to wash his butt, then brought him back to the changing station. Before I could slap on a new diaper, he peed……… all over the both of us.
Sigh life of a mommy. So I picked him up again, and went to wash him the second time. Got him clean, set him back down on the changing table….. and he peed. On both of us. AGAIN.
Seriously Fighter do you have two bladders or something!?
Totally not expecting the second attack, I think I panicked a bit and started throwing tissues at his crotch.
A few minutes later, the confinement auntie came up, saw me all frazzled and reminded me it was time for Fighter’s bath. She filled up his bathtub while I quickly changed out of my pee stained clothes (into new old clothes), and I gave him his bath.
Bath done, wrapped him up in a towel, dried him, and got his tshirt on. Went to put on his diaper so I unwrapped the towel around his bottom half… and saw the awesome present he’d left for me inside his towel wtf. T___________T
(in case you didn’t get it, he shat in his towel wtf.)
Fighter, you’ve really outdone yourself.
“You don’t say?”
Hahahah dunno whether to laugh or cry. T____T
The universe empathized and later the same day I got this as a joke gift from Fatty’s brother and his wife. What joke gift, this is seriously the most useful thing ever right now hahahaha. Can’t wait to use it please.
But after it all, you’re probably the only person who can pee and shit all over me, and I don’t mind… too much. Lolol.
And I think Daddy would agree with me huh?
In every family, there has to be that one clown not looking at the camera and spoiling the family photo. Lolol.