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9 things I will teach my future daughter

Next week is my 20 week appointment with the obgyn!

That means we get to confirm what gender Bump is. :3 :3

Last month, we already detected a gender, but the month before that, it looked like it was a different gender wtf.  Doctor asked us not to announce or start shopping yet and for us to only confirm on our 20 week appointment.

Gan cheong max I half wanted to schedule an earlier appointment so we can find out sooner, but also scared to find out cos ignorance is bliss wtf.

Obviously this time I want a girl.

With Fighter, I actually wanted a boy.  Straight off the bat, the minute we found out I was pregnant, I envisioned a baby boy inside me, and the doctor just confirmed Fighter was a boy in the third month.  Not sure why I felt so strongly about it either.  I rationalized that I liked the idea of an older brother taking care of a younger sibling but that wasn’t it exactly.  And none of our family members are particularly conservative must have a son type so it wasn’t that either.

Dunno, I just imagined having a baby boy!  Call it gut feel or what, but that was that, and I didn’t even mind not getting to buy pink baby stuff hahaha.

But with Bump, I really cannot tell.  All I know is now I want a girllllllllllllllllllllllllllll.

Is it cos my own family has one boy and one girl and to me that’s the perfect combo? Maybe but not totally also.

Some people asked why I wanted a girl and I said, “WHO ELSE CAN I PASS MY MAKEUP AND FASHION SKILLZ TO?”

They all went hahaha and chalked it up to my shallowness. -_-

It’s true ah!!! I didn’t hone my makeup skills for nothing wtf.

But not the full picture either.  It’s always mommy’s boys and daddy’s little girls but I would totally have such a great bond with my daughter!

I looooove Fighter and would die for him but there’s only so much I can teach him about being a man, because I’m not one.  However I have had 20+ years experience being a girl and there’s so many things I would like to tell my future daughter.

Take care of her appearance

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Mummy Ooi taught me how to cleanse and care for my skin as a teen when I started breaking out.  Thanks to her I still have a strict skincare regime twice daily which I never skip no matter how tired I am.  Mummy Ooi never wore much makeup though besides the usual lipstick, maybe BB cream and mascara, so the rest of what I know I learned myself.

I’d teach her how to care for her appearance.  How to take care of her skin and hair, how to make herself presentable, how to dress to suit her body shape, how to give the world a good impression.  Because let’s face it, the world can be a harsh, judgmental place.

But also…

Despite all this, when it comes down to it, looks don’t matter

I’d teach her that even if the world defines you by your looks, you must never judge someone else based on their appearance.  Even more, you must never judge YOURSELF based on your appearance.

Wipe your makeup away and what you’ll have is the same person underneath.  You are the same person, with or without makeup on (for that matter, with or without money), not better, not worse. Looking better than someone doesn’t mean you’re better than them, kinder or smarter.  While it’s important to take care of your appearance, it’s even more crucial you take care of your heart and character.  Being a good person matters more than having a good face/body/hair.

Whether you choose to put on a makeup face every morning or not is entirely up to you.  Mommy will teach you if you’re interested but if you’re not, it doesn’t matter either way. When you remove that makeup, or if you choose to not put on any, remember you are still that same person.  Don’t lose your confidence over yourself or your achievements.  However you look, you are still you.

As a woman, there is nothing she can’t do

Courtesy of Mount Holyoke yo wtf. She wants to be an astronaut, can. She wants to be a housewife, sure.  Never think that because you’re a woman, there will be things off-limits to you.  If there’s never been a woman in that field, you can always be the first.  The world is yours.

Also, I would like you to attend Mount Holyoke but we can discuss this in fifteen years wtf.

Marry your best friend

Romance will fade and the butterflies in your tummy will eventually die down.  When picking a life partner, marry your best friend.  Marry the person whom you can genuinely talk to, laugh with, and the person you can do nothing with every day and still have fun.  Choose him based on his mind and his heart, not his looks or money cos god knows these won’t be yours forever.

Friends will come and go

If mean girls don’t want to be friends with you in school, TELL ME. I WILL ANNIHILATE THEM.

Remember that friends will come and go but that’s okay.  Have a cry and move on.  You will always meet new, sweeter, funnier, more awesome ones along the journey of your life. And there will always be that special few who will stick around for you.

For that matter, boys will come and go too

Again, cry and move on.  Your heart will heal itself faster than you think.  And there will be a better man.

(Don’t tell your dad, he might drive out with his golf club.)

Men will respect you as much as you respect yourself

Hold yourself in the highest respect, men will follow suit.  If you do not value yourself, nobody else will either.  Don’t let your self worth and happiness ever depend on someone else.  If he doesn’t appreciate you, sucks to be him wtf. There will be smarter, wiser men out there who will appreciate you for who you are, and not what you have to give them.

Education is numero uno

For the first 20 years of your life at least.  I don’t want you to be a tuition/extra class going child with no time for fun, but you will learn, and learn well.  We will give you the best educational opportunities we can afford because education is your stepping stone to the future.

Also, I hope you will love reading because that will be one of your most enriching experiences.  Never stop learning, no matter how old you are. It will make you a better person I promise.

(OMG I am such a kiasu Tiger mom already.)

You can always come home

No matter where you are, what you’ve done or what has happened, you will always have a place with us.  Never be afraid to come back cos you will always be loved.