If anyone is using a laptop, do this. Hold the top of the laptop screen and yank it down. If person at laptop is intently staring at the screen, he will jerk head downwards in attempt to keep up with the screen! I am telling the truth!

Boys and girls, please try this at home (unless your dad happens to be an alcoholic grump who will beat the shite out of you).

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Is it strange to want to stick stamps on the lefthand side of the envelope ar? The right side got no space what!

Instead, I kena laughed at and received a suggestion to put the stamps behind the envelope or worse still, put the stamps inside the envelope. Some more, you know those Mr Men characters? Like Mr Happy, Mr Angry etc?

The person said I should be Mr Wrong!

First of all I am not even a Mr! I am a female!

If I should be anything, it should be Miss Malaysia.:D

Regarding past entries, I have decided strongly that I am not vain. Vain is a person whose best friend is the mirror. I am not like that…. hor? Right? I am just particular about my looks. Because looks gives you the all-important first impression of someone, whether they’re likable or not. Not counting bitchy faces lar.

Oh, and if anyone has noticed that my English today is not so up to standard as normal, then good!

I have decided to use Malaysian English is my blog from now on.

Reason? I just received a DHL package from my uni today..a whole bunch of forms lar, nothing interesting. But then it occured to me that in the next 4 years, I shall probably get BRAINWASHED by all those ang mohs and *gasp* turn into a kwai mui myself! Okay lar maybe I’m overreacting, but I will still definitely miss Malaysian uniqueness. Therefore, I shall say as many lahs as I can before September. Byebye ESL!! *boots Perfect English into ionosphere*

Top 7 things I will miss about Malaysia:

#1: saying “lah”, “malou”, broken English, etc. Duh, this is like the most obvious one.

#2: saying Pukima!!

#3: Malaysian food: laksa in Penang, roti canai near Holiday Villa, kai fan at Success, pan mee at Tijuana, koay teow th’ng at Mee Yoke, nasi lemak at the dirty mamak down the road frm Mee Yoke, sambal, limau ais, soba (eh?)

#4: Malaysian weather, most of all. I know me being Ms Pah-pai, I’ll be the first one to complain about our temperature, but please! Remember that in winter, temperature over there reaches 0 degrees Fahrenheit! Sorry lah, but I don’t think I be setting foot in class during winter.

#5: Sungei Wang!! All the beautiful Jap fashion clothes will pass me by… Goddammit, I shall be relegated to children’s boutiques. I’ll be forced to buy, say a pair of jeans and snip out the embroidery of Goofy on the back pocket.

#6: hair dye meant for Asian hair:( The close friends (especially those that had to dye my hair in sufferable conditions) will know that my hair does NOT take hair dye for some reason. Apply the dye and it disappears. I swear! The only reason my hair is so damn ‘kam’ now is cos I dyed it a gazillion times already. Macam mana pulak itu hairdye yang dibuat bagi orang putih. How I’m going to redo my hair while I’m over there is still a big problem. Who has a good idea, please raise your right hand! And then use it to click on the tagboard and tell me.

#7: Most of all, the people here la! Family, friends, the Indian ah pek who sells papers outside Shell in 19… *sob sob* make sure you all keep in touch I tell you! If not you get a box from me.

Top 3 things I will not miss about Malaysia:

#1: poisonous-smelling and radioactive public toilets. And having to pay 20 cents for use of smelly toilets. And another 30 cents for tissue paper when you’re plain out of it but you feel you HAVE to because your bowels are just about to implode.

#2: bangalas and scary Malay buggers that give you the hamsap stare when you walk past them wearing tshirt and jeans. *vomits blood*

#3: Malaysian Censorship Board. Screw you la! Brady Bunch movie also want to censor! Siao lang. Haha porn here I come! Kidding!