Due to severe pre-menstrual syndrome symptoms (which include first and foremost, plain sadness)and a broken heart, Audrey is not fit to blog at the moment.

However, her alter ego, *makeup biatch* will fill in for her today.

“Reporting to you live from the studio, I, *makeup biatch* regret to say that Audrey, though not grumpy, is highly unjubilant from what is suspected to be the dreaded PMS. Yet the period itself hasn’t arrived, making her even more irritable because she is dying to find out whether she is well and truly cured from her ovary problem, and only this period will set her mind at ease.

Also, she is not exactly broken hearted (*makeup biatch*, like Audrey, is prone to exaggeration – Editor) but is just down because she has found out that Mr Summer Fling-Ee is also interested in her but does not want to do anything because she is leaving.”

(*makeup biatch* runs over and thrusts microphone up Mr Summer Fling-Ee’s nose)

“Sir! Sir! Any comments for faithful audree.blogdrive.com readers?”

“Yes, this is what I said to her today: You’re going off already, we don’t start anything now.”

(camera pans to Audrey lurking in the corner, sobbing her lungs out)

AUDREY RELEASES PRESS STATEMENT:

It is not as bad as that ok!! I am as usual talking cock and exaggerating things beyond belief. I did not sob my mucous out, neither did I stab Mr Summer in the groin ala Kill Bill. But it is annoying, without a doubt. Of all guys, I had to fall for one who is serious in relationships and does not want summer flings.

POOH.