This has been a most suay two days for my eyes.

On Sunday night, while eating dinner at Esquire Sungei Wang with the Oois, chillied soup splashed from my bowl into my right eye. Cried even more than when Darren left.

Then the same night, whilst yum-chaing at Burger King with Eng, Kok Kin and Diana, A FUCKING MOTH FLEW INTO MY EYE. I saw it zooming straight at my left eye and before I could even react, a sinking coldness spread through my eyeball.

DAMN FUCKING SICK OKAY!!! SINCE WHEN DO MOTHS KAMIKAZE INTO PEOPLE’S EYEBALLS?!

For some reason I still wanted to act cool and nonchalantly swiped at my eye with my hand, hoping that the fucking moth was gone. Thank god it was la.

Nobody else has had this experience, I don’t think. Therefore I declare myself Queen of Moth Haters. Move over, Hsin and Angela.

Then today during lunch, a piece of curried rice from my nasi kandar flew into my right eye again. Again I cried bucketloads of tears and sneezed and dripped mucus. Good la Audrey, keep it up and you might just go blind.

Okay moving on. Let me talk about my prospective career as a chef.

See, I lost a bet with Darren and Jia Min, what the bet is we don’t need to talk about la, too long story.

If I won the bet, Darren was supposed to cook for me a Jap dinner. If I lost, I would have to cook a Chinese dinner for him and Min.

Obviously I lost.

So I had to cook. Let me emphasise that this is my first time cooking anything other than microwaved maggi mee and rice.

Hero lah both of them still die die want me to cook without any assistance.

SO here is the evidence.

::This is me washing the vegetables.::

::This is me chopping up the pork.::

::This is me not knowing what to do next and so kena marah from Mummy Ooi. ::

::This is me putting the salted vegetable onto the pork.::

::This is me chopping luncheon meat.::

::This is me cooking the luncheon meat.::

Aiya all right all right, in the end Darren cooked the luncheon meat because frankly, I was too afraid of the fire and spitting oil. People got pyrophobia can?!

::Ta-dah! Finished product.::

::Me being exhausted after cooking. KNN, I cook until hand shake ok! How I know the spatula so heavy!::

::Food Recipient No. 1, and me, SHADDUP LA I KNOW IM DAMN FAT HERE::

::Food Recipient No. 2 and me. I may look fat here too but I am actually puffing out my cheeks::