Ah, so yesterday was my last day.

I could be emo and gush about how I’m going to miss the whole lot: Nasser, Joanne, Remus, Kate, Mother Teresa, etc. But I’m not going to for now because I can finally sleep in! After one month of slapping myself to keep awake on the train, snoring (literally) in Joanne’s car on the way to work, piling on the concealer to cover those eyebags, I can finally sleepsleepsleepsleep.

Was supposed to go for a farewell dinner with Nasser at California Pizza Kitchen but instead was conned by bosses and Remus/Joanne to go for KWONG WAH YIT POH 95TH ANNIVERSARY DINNER AT PJ HILTON OMFG.

Apparently this is the most popular newspaper in Northern Malaysia and the oldest Chinese newspaper in the WORLD (this is according to a FIFTEEN MINUTE VIDEO they showed which lasted thru and after I went to the toilet to take a crap).

Summary of dinner:

THE GOOD:
They served shark’s fin soup and abalone (10 course dinner ma). Good shit.

THE BAD:
The dumbass waitress took away my bowl of shark’s fin before I could say that I wasn’t finished.

THE UGLY:
When eating broccoli, the fucking stalk was too hard until the permanent retainer for my lower jaw broke. 🙁

THE BAD:
Speeches by newspapers bigshots and guest of honor Ong Kah Ting lasted near an hour.

THE UGLY:
Everyone was forced to sing happy birthday and yam seng to the newspaper’s health (?)

THE BAD:
Entertainment consisted of singers resembling Filipino hotel lounge singers belting out Chinese oldie after Chinese oldie (Yeh Lai Siang etc)

THE UGLY:
Entertainment also consisted of a magician from China, ie. overweight man in ill-fitting suit, whose idea of a good magic trick is to pull out cigarettes from his sleeve and smoke them. For about 15 minutes. And then switch and start pulling out shiny plastic tacky flowers instead. For another 30 minutes.

THE UGLIER:
Magician had, in addition to two female assistants, TWO DANCERS clad in cheongsams whose only job was to stand there and sway their arms in various patterns for the whole show.

So that was my farewell.

And look what I found in the newspaper!

Sorry for huge size of picture, but how else are you people going to read the caption because I am incapable of clever computer tricks that will show you the big version of a small picture when you click on it. Bear with it.

They have invented a Takekopta aka buluh terbang! Fine, its only a toy, but it’s still a Takekopta! Today, toy takekopta, tomorrow the world! Literally! After this they’ll create a real working Takekopta… and then how far away is the Doko De Mo Doa?! MUAHAHAHAHA.