So I’m a great believer of horoscopes, especially after ex-boyfriends in the past.
Angela found a horoscope site today which has to be the most sohai site on horoscopes ever put up. She was reading all the negative traits and predictions for every horoscope and by god every single one is damn funny ok hahahahahahha.
Let me put some of them here!
She told me: Aquarius (that’s me!) always makes the same mistakes cos I’m an idiot WTF and that I lie a lot (wtf no la only the same amount as other people ok wtf) and that everyone thinks I’m stupid why like this T___________T
But Angela’s was worse! (She is Gemini) It said that she’s superficial and people usually like her because she’s homosexual WTF HAHAHAHAHAHA
Then we thought Scorpio was the worst. (Brother Ooi is Scorpio) It said: “In business you will have very good skills but noone will trust you. You also have no sense of morality but maybe that’s why you’ll be successful” WTF. Then it also said that most Scorpios die because they got murdered HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
But then we looked at Libra and it was even worse! (Libra is Fat Her Ooi and Suet) “Most Librans are prostitutes WTFWTF HAHAHAHAHAH and if you’re a male Libra you’re possibly gay” HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH HOW CAN LIKE THIS WAN And then it went on to say that Librans will die of STDs and the chance to get money or jobs is 0 WTF HAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
SO MY DAD WILL DIE OF STD AND MY BROTHER WILL GET MURDERED WTF
Virgos will fall asleep during sex HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA
Cancer (my mother) : for other people’s stuff you sympathise a lot but you never try to help. You are so stupid that people use you and you’ll only realise after they use you. Then you bitch behind their back. You always delay stuff that’s why you have to depend on social welfare to live your life WTF. Your worth is less than shit. Most people in jail are Cancers WTF HAHAHAHAHAH
I asked how about Capricorn? (Yeff, Grace, my grandma wtf) : you don’t like challenges , afraid of having adventures in life, basically you are a coward, none of the famous people is your horoscope, you should commit suicide now
HAHAHAHAHAHA HOW CAN ASK PEOPLE TO COMMIT SUICIDE HAHAHAHA
The rest weren’t that funny so I didn’t put up.
Ok night!
Comments (18)
sagittarius leh!
aud: sagittarius wasn’t funny that’s why! angela told me but i forgot wtf.
Damn wtf LOL!
I am Cancerian ok, how come I’m still roaming free and inflicting myself on the general populace and haven’t been put in jail yet wtf.
aud: haha say hi to my mum if u see her in jail wtf
woo… i am a liar… aud, you are damn ugly! hahaha..
OMG I am also an aquarius!!!
i am a liar!
aud: so many aquariuses! ya so am i T_T
*checks
Why no Aries ok byebye wtf
aud: aries wasn’t interesting!
i’m an aquarius too. i lie a lot. does tht make me not an aquarius?
hahahah does that mean i m doomed to fall asleep when i have sex??
aud: i guess it does *nods gravely haha
why can like this one? ask me to commit suicide! cis..
aud: ya hahahaha the site damn stupid la i think they just make stuff up!
luckily never put aries ah hahahahaha. means still not so bad.
aud: haha ya aries wasn’t so bad that’s why!
HAHAHAHAH OMG I NEARLY DIED LAUGHING OK AH SOU HAHAHAHA
eh pisces leh do they say that pisceans should jst drown themselves in their tears because they’re too sensitive and emotional for their own good HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH WTF
aud: oh i know pisces! pisceans’ friends all secretly hate them and they’re paranoid to the extent that they think the FBI is after them WTF HAHAHAHA
Hahahaha XD I’M HOMO BECAREFUL AUD I MIGHT RAPE U WHILE U SLEEP WTF
aud: wuuu let me lock my door then wtf
Commit suicide? I’d rather kill. wtf.
aud: hahahaha good joke! wtf.
i;m a virgo.. ahahaha.. i’ll fall asleep during sex, huh?
Hi Aud,
what about Taurus? I REALLY X 10000 wants to know… LOLz… Be glad that you aint in LONDON now… It’s f**king cold… -3degree at night and yet no snow … LOL.. I doubt it will.. LOL… I am slow sia, now then i know Angie is from Vancouver… i tot she is from Taiwan… LOL…
Anyway, 7 countries in just a year.. YOU ARE SOOOOOOOOOOOOO LUCKY…. LOLz…
Alrighty babe, you girls have a GREAT CHRISTMAS and MERRY MERRY CHRISTMAS … Hugs…
aud: im in vancouver now! its about the same temperature as london i think.. it snowed today but it was wet snow which is worse than rain T_T merry christmas to u ! *hugs
Gemini!!! How about Geminis?
aud: oh sorry i forgot to say angela is gemini! so geminis are homosexual wtf =.=
what bout Aries?? and Leo?
aud: im not sure cos the site is in chinese and angela translated only some for me:( i think Leos are very proud and go around beating people up WTF
Angie : “IāM HOMO BECAREFUL AUD I MIGHT RAPE U WHILE U SLEEP”
O_O !!
That’s hot.
Excuse me but I gotta go ejaculate myself.
aud: WTF.
Wow.. I am gona die of STD after being unable to sell my body for a living as no one wants to pay me for sex. ahhahahha.. this is damn funny! š Merry Christmas! š