Because of my recurring UTI, the doctor made me come back today to take a pee test for them to send to the lab to see if the bacteria is totally gone.
And I hate peeing in a cup lor!
[OKAY IF YOU HAVE A FAINT SPIRIT YOU SHOULD GO AWAY NOW AND NOT PAY ANY MORE ATTENTION TO PEPET MONOLOGUES]
Most of the time I miss it totally. How I know how to angle the cup! So for sure it will all slosh over my hand.
And secondly even if I get the angle and position of the cup right, I dunno if I have a big bladder or the cup is too small or what but I always ALWAYS fill the cup in like 2 seconds and then for the next ten the rest of the pee will be sloshing over my hand again FML.
Does this happen to anyone else!
Guys have it good cos they have aiming equipment.
What’s more, today I discovered that when you collect pee, you’re supposed to collect only the “middle” pee ?!?!
They don’t want the pee when you first start, and they don’t want the pee when you’re finishing.
Very pressure lor!
How to know when the beginning ends and when the last part begins!
Obviously with this kind of restriction, more pee sloshed on my hand before and after.
And because I underestimated, I only collected like 5mm of pee fml.
And then when I finished, I saw…
NO TOILET PAPER!!!! SUPER WTF FTS!
Anyway pee sent to lab and just waiting for results now. Can we all hold hands and pray that I am bacteria free wtf.
Comments (46)
hahaha so funny
good luck 🙂
i know! i hate to pee into the cup too. so terseksa, have to make sure pee zhun zhun (like aim correctly) into the cup. else if the urine kena own hand really FML. den must make sure drink water kaukau before that. firstly, to make sure can pee. secondly, to make sure the urine doesn’t turn out like apple juice or what. -_- anyways hope ur results are okay. n oh yea, happy new year! =)
Drink lot lot lot lot lot lot lot lotssss of water to prevent UTI in the future, if once kena, must take medicine only can cure ! I know how hard it is, it’s a common infection among women !
im UTI prone too >.<
fr experience,now i bring along one of those disposal paper cup with me when i go 4d urine test. kinda ez once u learn how 2catch d middle urine flow. start by peeing a little in2 d toilet, stop d urine flow n adjust d disposal paper cup under “there” (d rim will be wide enuf n u wont get slosh by urine) release yr pee n collect whatever u need…stop again n remove cup n pee d rest of d urine. Then just pour d urine fr d cup in2 d tiny urine container..n disposed d used cup. Tadaa…. es peasy!
n oh oh…my doc says always alwasy pee b4 n after sex. not very romantic but if it keeps d UTI away im all for it.
Good luck on yr test.
man that sucks! I know how gross it is to have to pee into the cup..what more if they gave you a cup made of GLASS. I thought that we were supposed to use plastic ones so they can be thrown away after..but glass ones? who knows how many millions have used before me? fml!
Let Angel Tim helps you kill the bacteria and return the cute Audrey back ;p
hahahah i’m not shaking your hand!
“Guys have it good cos they have aiming equipment”
LoL..
wrap your hands with plastic first !!
ewww.
u are so cute!!!!
anyway, drink lots of cranberry juice! they are the best thing to fight against UTI!
I wouldn’t mind holding your hand and pray with you but after all these ‘pee on the hand’ talk, hmmm…maybe not. =P
But u really described the whole ‘situation’ very well.
Luckily I’ve yet to be asked to pee in a cup! Thanks for sharing though! Lol.
Audrey, you always describe something in such a funny way! LOL~
Anyways, do take care ya! Do drink LOTS of water! =)
i used to get UTI all the time. FML!
then i found out that as soon as you feel like you going to get UTI (like when you keep having to go toilet more than you usually do), then quickly drink lots of cranberry juice. it’s a lifesaver i swear!
lol… dont want hold hand, just pray only can or not?
haha…
do take care and get well soon. and oh, i google the UTI thing, the only way to cure is to drink a lot of water wor…
Yes I’ll pray for you but I’m soo not gonna hold your hand for this time 😀
FML. eeeek u so disgusting wan ah…(but secretly I oso can’t do it properly)…hoho
hahaha..d 1st 2 seconds, it comes out slowly ma thats y chun. i think most ppl r like that. u need time 2 cultivate d “instrument” 2 follow ur thinking. but then after 2 seconds ZOOOM!!! big splash like waterfall. At that time i think will kali chun HAHAHAHAHA
maybe next time use ur hand to block d pee into d little cuppa. 🙂
HAHAHAH ya, i totally understand how gross it is to ter-pee on your hand. And ya, the glass pee cup T_T
And the middle stream thing, I simply pee a bit then straight away collect. hahahahaha. -___-
Ah I feel you Aud… But your story is really funny! Here’s wishing to Bacteria-free days! 🙂
Hi Audrey,
Have u tried the “URAL” from Guardian? It really works! u should give it a try
i’ve not tried peeing in cups, but how bout this – peeing into test tubes WTF! back in the uk, often there’ll be people in clubs/bars giving out freebies to those who does the urine test, and i always cheat my way – by mixing coke with water coz i can never fill pee into a frigging test tube la, especially not when i’m tipsy!
hope everything will turn out fine for u! 🙂
omg toilet in clinic/hospital no toilet paper?!?!!! the blasphemy! this is why i always make sure to bring tissue paper into the toilet with me when in msia.
i really don’t know why they make women pee in a such a freakin small cup. think we all suddenly sprout a penis when we have to pee in a cup, is it? honestly. some more have to use the ‘middle pee’. damn pressure.
now all i can think of is all the women before u who didn’t have toilet paper n had to touch the SAME DOOR HANDLE. gross gross gross!
hahaha. my experience lagi worst. i was schedule for a medical checkup in the morning and i totally forget to drink water before i leave my house and straight away went to the clinic. upon reaching there, she gave me this tube and ask me to pee inside. i went to the toilet but i dont think i could pee cos no water in bladder!
and the damn big tube dont have label until where i must pee. i even called up my friend to ask him how much should i pee.
well luckly he didnt answer.
so i went out to the nearest restaurant to ask them to derma me some water to drink. when she looked at the tube i was holding, she asked “tak boleh kecing ke?”
damn… it was my most embarassing moment.
anne: thanks!
cherry: apple juice WTF hahaha
jess: ya im drinking 6 glasses of water a day now!
RO: thats a really good idea! *holds hands with u cos ur also uti prone
veronica: WTF ive never heard of glass pee cups!! ya eww i wonder how they sterilize them
tianchad: yay! ^_^
ky: *hugs ky wtf
nana: haha put my hands in plastic bags first?
dheepan: i know!
angel: i did that and it didn’t work:( the only thing that works for me is antibiotics 🙁
pingping: cannot, only counts when we hold hands! 😛
lurveangel: haha be prepared if u do but i hope you never have to do it!
joshualaw: haha thanks joshua!
amy: didn’t work for me! T_T
donna: cannot cannot only way is to hold hand. hahaha
lil: “runs and grabs lil
tera: super fol!
messi: use hand to block ma even worse TT
choco: but dont u like spray everywhere hahaha
iamthewitch: hahah thankeww
hello: i have! worked once for me but after that it didnt 🙁
pj: HAHAHAH WHY U SO SOHAI MIX COKE WITH WATER WTF HAHAHAAH IMAGINE WHEN THEY TEST IT
irene: eww! i washed my hands la i hope they did too!
melmonica: HAHAHAHHA FYL HAHAHA I WANNA GIVE U A HUG OUT OF PITY
HAHA. I soooo totally agree with you on this one!!!
lol! didn’t know collecting midstream urine sample so hard one for females!
no toilet paper?? 😀
hahaha at least pee is sterile? 😀
I’ve never had so much fun reading about pee before.
🙂
lol aiming equipment..
but some guys might suck at aiming.. =P
Haha! I had the same problem too last time. Until the last time I did a medical checkup, I learnt one good technique.
1. Always drink a lot of water so you can collect enough urine.
2. Usually, there’ll be a small basin or scoop there in the toilet. Pee into it. Always remember, only collect the midstream of your urine.
3. How to collect midstream? Easy. Try pee 1 or 2 seconds first and stop. Hold it. Then, pee into the small basin.
4. Pee for just for 3 to 4 seconds.
5. Then, pee off the rest into the toilet bowl.
6. After that, just pour the rest of the urine in the small basin into the bottle provided.
Easy way to collect urine! And best thing about it is that your hands will never get in touch with the urine. And, I realise that by doing this, my pee would be super clean and clear compared to other samples. Muahahaha!
haha…i’ll hold your hand to pray together when i’m assured it’s all well washed…lol..:P
ok, jokes aside. Hope all the sickening bacteria is all cleared! shoo! go away from aud you bad bacteria!raww~
😀
haha! really funny lor… i guess it really is harder for chicks to aim. 😀
I hate it too! I had to wait for damn long to pee (and my mum complains ‘coz she waits with me). And when I finally get to pee, as you said, it’s the bad aiming and also die die must take middle portion. Then need to pee again which is another long wait!
I HATE PEEING IN THE CUP!!!!
and you really made me lol-ed haha
em actually have anyone told u to wipe from front to back? it decreases the risk of uti
recently following ur blog, first time commenting.
actually, i used to get UTIs all the time too. i think for me it was from doing the deed. not sure if thats the same case with urself.
i started to always pee before the deed and i think that helped.
it had gotten so bad for me that even the meds didnt really work anymore.
so i went online and bought these drops called Native-remedy UTI Clear and they actually worked. And no, this is not an advertisement!! not sure if you can get it sent to malaysia though, cuz i’m in canada.
good luck! i know UTIs can be quite annoying!!
“Can we all hold hands…”
Poor Boss… 😛
I KNOW RIGHT!!!! I hate peeing in a cup too!!!!!!!! hello pepets are not designed for that kind of shit wtf…
Hi Aud,
Try drinking 2 packets every hour til its gone. it really does cure my uti really fast. hope that helps! 🙂
I think barley with lime helps to clear UTI. Aud, when r u posting d new hairstyle u got fm?
hahahaha the funny Aud is back!! sings* i wanna hold you ha~~nd, i wanna hold your hand~*
this made me laugh so much XD
you’re so funny, & I hope you feel better soon!
I don’t even know if you check the comments for backdated entries but here goes:
Girls who have recurring UTI do so mainly due to two common reasons:
1. You wear g-strings regularly. They are actually pretty bad for you. They are bound to move around during the course of a day, and due to the short distance between our sphincter and vagina, bacteria from the butt will be transported to the UT area, therefore causing an infection.
2. When you have UTI, you need to get your boyfriend treated too if you are having sex. You might be passing it around, therefore getting it again soon after getting better.
And a lot of girls get it because their boyfriends aren’t religious enough in their cleaning rituals… You need to get him to be super careful about cleaning his equipment, especially before sexual activities. Circumcision also helps if he is willing to take the plunge.
And oh, always pee immediately after sex, cuddling can come later.