The Wheels on the Bus Go Round and Round…

Okay, everyone, whatever Jia Min says about my driving skills today, it’s not true.

I’m not mentioning names but today I kindly did someone a GIGANTIC favor by going to pay his saman for him at MPSJ. *sighs dramatically* The cons of being so sweet, kind, adorable, etc.

Anyway, for some reason, driving around I got honked at like fcuk. Can everyone please have pity and mercy for this poor tiny girl with the P sticker driving her mother’s fcuking humongous Civic, which is damn low and cannot go over speedbumps without scraping its underbelly horrendously? So I had to go pick Min up because guess what – I don’t know the way to MPSJ. I didn’t tell the person with the saman that because I wanted to jaga imej… I mean please, how can a person who has stayed in Subang Jaya for 15 years not know how to go to MPSJ? For the record, I don’t know how to go to Taipan either. Or Hsin‘s house, without memorising the directions (ie. turn left, turn right, turn right again etc).

Anyway, we made our way into USJ, weaving our way professionally thru the traffic, not on purpose mind you, but because I couldn’t make up my mind which lane to stay on. We finally reached MPSJ after doing what looked like a vaguely illegal U-turn at the traffic lights. And the goddamn MPSJ had roads which were the size of the longkang behind your house. There was no place to park except right next to the sign that said “No Parking”. And I’ll be damned if I’m going to commit a traffic offence right there in their headquarters. The traffic police/MPSJ boss would probably slap the ticket right on my windshield and bellow,”Dik, senang saja you nak bayar itu saman. You pergi naik tangga atas ke itu kaunter bayaran, lepas tu sudah selesai”.

Since I was suffering from severe hunger pangs and irritation and since Min was going to be late for class, I did the next best thing: I parked in the parking lot meant for the kakitangan. Seeing a whole bunch of what looked kakitangan MPSJ outside the entrance of the parking lot, I cleverly pressed the oil and zoomed in, hoping I looked like one of their kind. Then I quickly parked and ran upstairs with Min. After depleting my wallet of 80 bucks, we zoomed out of MPSJ and went for lunch then I sent Min to Monash.

Later in the day, I had to go pick Min up from Monash again cos she didn’t have transport. As I backed my car out of the driveway, I heard this weird grinding sound, my car started shaking then stopped. My first thought was, what did I roll over? But no, when I looked around, I realized that I drove into the gate. While it was already open. Surprisingly, noone came out to check on the damage so I quickly went off hoping that they didn’t hear. Then I parked my car at the side of the road to check the injuries. I noticed there was some neighbours standing around and thinking that they might tell my mother, I quickly went off again.

Then on the way to Monash I got honked at all they way as usual. When Min came into the car, she was listen to my sob story, naturally. And as we were driving out, who should we see but Aden, of all people. Jia Min recognised him, I don’t know how but I thought we got the wrong person. Even after I wound down the window and we started talking I still somehow thought that was the wrong person and that he’d also mistaken us for somebody else. I’ve only seen him once before ok!

Then after that while driving, I tried to keep my eyes open at all times to ensure no more honking or close calls. I kept my eyes so wide open that I didn’t notice I had been driving the entire time without letting go the handbrake. No wonder there was a suspicious squeaking, creaking kind of sound that at first I thought was part of the song on radio, then later I thought had to do with my car’s injury from hitting the gate.

No more Audrey behind the wheel for some time.

Person with the saman: You owe me 80 bucks and a lot of emotional stress.