Note: I took nearly a day to decide whether or not to put this post up. I spoke to a few people about it, and while some reacted with sympathy, others laughed or brushed it off. I don’t think I could take more disparagement. If I change my mind later, I will take this post down.
The good news is that yesterday I received a whole bunch of calls and emails to schedule interviews for next week. =)
The bad news is that I went for an interview today…
Some people might know which university it is that I interviewed with.
I am not saying names for privacy’s and propriety’s sake.
But it is a private institution, and this was my 2nd interview there.
I met with one of the directors, who offered me a position, complete with pretty decent pay for a fresh graduate. Taking the job would mean that I had the chance to get to where I want to be in my life.
But then he started doing very inappropriate things to me.
We were in the reception area and he said we should head to his office to talk more. Then he put out his hand to me so I took it, thinking he wanted to shake my hand.
But he held on to my hand and pulled me with him to the elevator.
He tried to hold my hand again in his office.
He also caressed my cheek and stroked my hair a few times.
When we were leaving his office he extended one arm to me for like a one-armed hug so I just cordially patted his shoulder.
But he pulled me to him and hugged me and pressed his cheek against mine. (I dunno if he was aiming for my lips and got my cheek instead)
What happened to me cannot be compared to the ordeals of rape or molest victims of course.
But I think this is sexual harrassment, even before I start work wtf.
Even though he didn’t touch me anywhere intimate, I felt violated and shamed enough.
And I was a bundle of raw nerves being alone in his office and elevator with him.
I don’t really understand why I felt so bad. I told my mom and I wanted to tell my dad and brother myself, but I struggled with coming out and saying it because I kept feeling so ashamed even though I know it’s not my fault.
Instead I spent the whole day being silent and finding it difficult to laugh at funny things. I didn’t even feel like talking to anyone, which is already very chronic for me.
Fuck perverted old, short, dark men with oily long hair. Make me feel like shit for no reason!
I went out with Hsin, Mitch, Dennis, Shaun and Jill earlier and laughed a lot. So I feel much better right now, which is why I am blogging about this.
If what I have heard is true, and their management culture is really one that not only does not discourage leering and other forms of sexual harassment and discrimination, but may even indirectly abet it, taking it as some macho power game, then I swear to god I am going to bring this corporation down. This is going to be a lifetime vendetta wtf.
Where is the justice in this world if people who are in power get away with shit just because of who they are? And are people (and students) like me just expected to shut up and put up with it because we are not in a position to do anything about it?
Fuck you assholes.
P/S: If you’re going to leave a comment, please do not mention the university name if you think you know it. All comments with such names will be deleted. If you want to verify it, just think of the worst private university you know, and you are probably right.
Comments (80)
Hey babe, I went off too early that day, didn’t get to comfort you or make you feel better.. But in any case, I am sure seeing all these comments only emphasized what I said that day! NOT YOUR FAULT, and what a bastard! And I know how you feel. 🙁 I didn’t tell you that day, ’cause I had to go offline.. Tell you some other time k! 🙂
And good luck for your interviews! Tell me when you’re coming down k! :)))
So sorry to hear that. What did you wear for that interview? I support you. I will whack this guy for you.
know what babe, the perv is an asshole. he deserves to rot in jail. bring him down, i tell ya..
aud, i initially thought otak puki is some japanese word. hehe.
hmm, but im not laughing at what u been thru. and yah, it’s not our fault of course. But i think it can be considered as sexual harrasment liao. Anyway, do take care and wish u all d best in the upcoming interviews. cheers =)
wtf
worst ever private uni i can think of is S–I.
just make a formal complaint to the management and see how they handle it first k.
🙂 dont worry
mike foo>>why is it relevant what she wore to the interview arh? u ignorant pig
ok after grazing through the comments, i think u shld make a police report. if the policemen say it’s small thing, tell them u wanna make it anyways.
DONT EVER think just bcoz hes somebody in the society, he can get things done and settled. just tell urself that he got more to lose than u, his reputation and respect and standing in the society since hes so-called “somebody”.
kick his ass deep deep legally.
The comments above already stated what I want to say. So I won’t repeat. But do something about this. Don’t let him think he can get away with this.
Go report it Audrey. You can save many other girls out there
OMFG!!!
poor u,
like other comments
kick his ass hard!!!
u cant let him slip by just like this.
will b more victims in the future
u have to be the life saver for the next victims.
u got our support~
n dun feel ashamed!!!
really… u really done nothing wrong… put all da blame on that farking asshole
Aud perhaps you should and make a police report..such a shame la what kind of uni is that??!
i hope u r feeling better now 🙂
Aud perhaps you should go and make a police report..such a shame la what kind of uni is that??!
this kind of ppl cant run away from karma so dont worry.
i hope u r feeling better now 🙂
That’s pretty serious, man. I hope you’ll feel better now, must’ve been a traumatic experience.
Well, at least you which job not to take. Wishing you good luck for your interviews next week. Hope the interviewers are civilized and not perverted.
Honestly, if u think this job will give you the future u want, i don’t see why a pervert should stop you from taking up the job. Lodge a complain. Find out if the academic institution has any helpline. I am sure they have. Call the helpline and request for them to follow up / conduct an investigation on this matter asap. At the meantime, lodge a police report. Afterall, you may withdraw the police report anytime in the event that after investigation, this whole thing turns out to be some sort of misunderstanding (which is highly unlikely).
I work in a professional organisation with thousands of employees, sexual harrasment is not uncommon. I have heard stories from people i know who got molested/harrased by sick directors/managers. These sick directors/managers, mostly bespectacled, looks almost innocent all the time. If it wasn’t because it happened to friends aka colleagues close to me, i wouldn’t believe that they’ll do such things!
I hope you will do something about this. Put an end to that pervert’s career in that academic institution! Take care!
and i do know how u feel because i got molested by this idiot on KTM once when i was just at the tender age of 12 years old. I was afraid to scream and shout too. If only i can turn back time, i’ll make damn sure the sick pedophile pays for what he did! Once again, take care!
Hi Audrey,I think you should not accept the job even though this is the future that you want.Seriously,I cannot tolerate sexual harrassment.Be careful all the time.
the nerve of some people..
i think you should report this case to the police and by all means publish the name of the university here, if this could happen to you i’m sure it could happen to any girls out there who might work there as well in the future. think of it as a way to protect other girls from suffering the same thing u did.
it should not be ignored and i think u should just make sure that jerk never gets a job anywhere..ever
i agree with black widow.
if ure going to work there, make a report to HR dept. I read it in news Today (tht weekly newspapers) saying that most HR dept in an org do its job (depending on the HR dept of course). this might happened to many other women in the org. do smth about it k? u dun deserve all these shits.
dun let that fucker get away so easily.
mt holyoke won’t allow this also.
argh, damn angry now.
Aud, I’ve always read your blog because you remind me of happy things and that gives me a break from reality.
19 years ago (yes, I’m really old -__-) something a little worse happen to me as a child, and yet to this day, I said nothing. I was only 9. I got confused, ashamed and scared. Then I ran away. The bastard went on and did the same to my younger sis.
I regret this with all my heart.
I can only pray that sis was too young to remember.
For me, the time has long passed to put things right. I don’t even remember his name now.
Assholes like that will strike again, and will only get more brazen because they got away with it the last time.
It must be known, that this is NOT acceptable. Be brave Audrey.
otak puki wtf? cunt brain?
anyway..report it to the ministry of higher education!!
This kind of people just like to act friendly and indirectly they get to achieve whatever they want to do…
I had the same experience before when I went to a big corporation for an interview and I rejected the offer. I doesn’t want to worry so much in the future working together with such pervert
feel very bad to heard about that..very hope tat i was not at the private university that u had decribe..from ur description of that disgusting n dirty old man..he was sexual harrassment u lar..realy kanasai lar..i think u better dun take down this job..he got do 1st time such things to u, i think he wil do second or third time..n so on..hmm…take care of ur own n good luck
p/s: 1st time look at ur blog, i like it..quite straight~~XD
badluct! pls do something bout it. think of the girls in d uni! take care girl.
im damn angry after reading this. on ur behalf (though i have no right, just a reader). but i am very very very very angry. how can that freak do this to u?!
u must protect urself (why do i sound ridiculous?). such a thing happened to my fren before. i went out with her, and an old man touched her. and she says she is used to it. (but of course i am not saying that u dont care. i have no rights to say anything regarding ur reaction as this did not happen to me, and my fren said i can protect her cos im a studying law!
whats this! we must protect ourselves! although i will willingly protect my friend and u if i am qualified but i am not! i hope no one will ever do this to u and my fren again
protect urself!!
You have to do something about it. Years later, you might be regreting and it is too late. Although it is M’sia not US but you have to speak out and take action. That perv will be in your mind forever until something is done. Do not feel ashamed, you did nothing wrong.
er i always learned that when people make questionable advances like that it’s only sexual harassment if you tell them to stop and they continue (since he didn’t go all the way pervy and touch you in places where the sun don’t shine wtf). so like if it happens again, you have to TELL them to stop. even though it’s totally not your fault they’re being a perv.
I hope you will do a police report. The person who did this to you deserved to be punished. I will support your decision. This is a crime.
every time someone molested me, i try my best to kick his shins or whatever.
once, i even ran after a guy in a club and then kicked him until he cried for his momma hahahaha. another one, i twist-pinch his nipple until his face blue.
stupid pukis think girls so easy to bully arh
UNACCEPTABLE.
GIVE ME THE FUCKERS NAME.
I WILL EXPOSE THAT FILTHY PERVERT TO HIS OWN FAMILY AND SHAME HIS NAME, AMD MAKE HIM A PRIME EXAMPLE OF WHY YOU SHOULD NEVER MESS WITH BLOGGERS.
I WILL DESTROY THAT FUCKER’S JOB NO MATTER WHAT IT TAKES DAMN IT.
JUST GIVE ME HIS NAME. YOU NEED NOT SHOW ANY MERCY.