Funny Fat Her stories

Things Ah Ma says

Inspired by Fatty‘s popular Things Shorty and Fatty Say series, here’s a special edition: Things Ah Ma says.


Since my parents are not around, Fatty and I took my grandma out tonight out for Christmas dinner.

So she sat across from us at the table.

Ah Ma: Why no customers one this restaurant?


Me: What do you mean?  Every table is taken.

I turn behind to look at where she was facing.



After dinner Fatty stopped by at a watch shop to check out a watch he liked.

Ah Ma: Wah all the watches’ faces so big!

Me: Ya lah it’s the trend nowadays.  Even mine is big, look at it!

Ah Ma: Ooooh.  It’s good to have big watches I suppose, good to look at (she says this in Hokkien so she says the word good-looking)

Me: Ya they do look ni–

Ah Ma: Don’t need to look so hard can easily see the time.


I wander over to Fatty to look at the watch he’s inspecting and go back to where my grandma is sitting.

Me: Wah guess how much the watch costs?  RM11,000.  So expensive.

Ah Ma (incredulous): WHAT? RM11,000? GOT DIAMONDS AH?

Me: No, don’t have.

Ah Ma: Siao!

1 minute later

Ah Ma (looking at the girl talking to Fatty who’s got a crewcut and dressed in a coat and slacks): You think this person is a boy or a girl?

Me: Girl.

Ah Ma: No it’s a boy.

Me: No she’s a girl Ah Ma. See how small-sized she is?

Ah Ma: Your dad is small-sized too, nobody mistakes him for a girl.


While waiting for the elevator.  The elevator takes some time to arrive so we end up waiting for a while.

Ah Ma: You know if there’s not many people waiting, the elevator won’t come.

Me (wondering what she’s talking about): Really?

Ah Ma: Of course la! You think the elevator is going to come just for you ah?


  • Seline

    Your version is funnier than Tim’s lar. Although I feel somewhat bad to be laughing at your grandma 😛

  • yblsm

    cute grandma! esp the elevator part! haha

  • Lila

    Hahahahaha why this ah ma so funny one

  • TeinNee Chin


  • iamyumimeiki

    ur ah ma super cute!

  • Susie

    Eeeee cutest stuff I’ve heard in a long while <3 Much love for your grandma from the UK! x

  • Xiu Ling

    Hahaha laugh die me.

  • Mei Mei

    Cute betul!

  • Crystal Ho

    Haha my ah ma also like that. Except she said if u wanna go down must press ‘up’ button so that the lift will come up to fetch you.

  • Jwxwei

    i imagined your ahma saying all of this in hokkien and it got 10x funnier wtf

  • hssinn

    (*^﹏^*) Hahaha so punny 

  • Ale

    You’re so funny!nnNew post in my blog: http://2almondeyes.blogspot.itnmy instagram alebjun

  • larvitard

    haha your ah ma so cute!! now i miss my ah ma 🙁

  • Esther

    Your dad small-sized too, nobody mistake him for a girl. Haha cracks me up! I want your grandmama….

  • lipkahyian

    you have a cute grandma 🙂 looking forward for more cute conversations like this.

  • jen

    can u make a video of you n tim speaking hockkien?? wish to hear how does u guys sound! haha..nnhockkien ah mas are always cute..i’m from penang too!

  • Coco

    Your whole family is funny ahahahahahaha. Cute ah ma!

  • Fourfeetnine

    Hahahaha thanks

  • Fourfeetnine

    Hahahah my hokkien is not that cheem la but Tim’s is worse leh I also don’t understand why considering he grew up in Penang. Don’t think he can do a video in hokkien hahahaha

  • Fourfeetnine

    Hahahaha you can marry into my family WTF. I have cousins wtf

  • Ping Ping

    Your grandma is soooo funny!!!like mine!!! My grandma says holomat instead of hormat. .mad love her bm!!! We always secretly look at our grandma n admire her cuteness

  • Elie

    This is a super cute post. If only there would be more. Hehehe. Lovely Ah Ma. ♥

  • Vivien Tee
  • Cath

    haha, your ah ma so ‘chubi’ LOL

  • Khor Hui Ying

    What language u guys speak ahahah just curious :)

  • Fourfeetnine

    Haha hokkien ah I just said!

  • Jocelyn

    hahahahahaa ur AH MA IS TOO FUNNY!nnI was kinda stressed thinking how gallballder removal gonna balloon my body, now at least I can relax after reading this.nnYour ah Ma heal me, emotionally.n

  • km

    lol.. couldn’t stop giggling especially about the girl/boy/dad debate

  • Angela


  • sgrmse.

    ROFALMFAO!!! don’t old people say the funniest things?!?! man, i love old folk. my gran says hilarious things all the time (in hokkien!) too :’Dnnawesomest post to date <3

  • Fourfeetnine

    Hahahaha that funny ah!

  • Fourfeetnine

    Cos she said in a very serious and confident way la ahhahahaahha

  • Fourfeetnine

    Gallbladder removal? D: take care get well soon!

  • Ying

    Ah Ma so cute!

  • sgrmse.

    yessss. damn cute pls.rn:’3