Behind you! What’s that!
April Fools WTF.
And that everybody, is the extent of my pranking abilities.
So don’t need to worry about getting fooled by me because I suck in bluffing people.
The other day having dinner with Pierre and Lay See, Tim slipped me some money under the table (tangkap rasuah ohhh WTF) and whispered to me to sneak to the counter to get the bill before Pierre did (because he would get suspicious if Tim got up)
I fretted and pored over how I would get to the counter without attracting attention. So I kept looking at the door cos that was where the counter was.
And Pierre and Lay See kept looking to the door to see what I was looking at.
And then I started giggling cos I couldn’t think how to pay the bill without them knowing!
And Pierre and Lay See kept looking to the door to see what was so funny there.
Then Tim got fed up and said that I am a failure (true story wtf)
And then… I forgot who paid in the end.
Anyway I am terrible at these kind of things!
Everytime someone tells me to look at someone maybe when we’re in a restaurant or something! Right away I say “where? where? is it that one” and stand up and point WTF.
But when I try to be discreet and look at them in an unsuspicious way…
I’ll crane my neck super slowly. While darting watchful looks to the right and left. And nudge my friend “which one is it that one!” haih wtf.
Or the other day at the bookstore!
I took a photo of a sign in the bookstore but Tim hissed “the staff is next to you” and I rotated to my left and held the camera at the left of my waist and ran out (staff didn’t notice)
And then I knocked over a cardboard sign on an easel (i think staff noticed)
Anyway happy April 1!
I’m trying to sleep earlier so good luck to me babai.
edit: I have no idea how to fix the Google feed problem. But I think if you subscribe to me at fourfeetnine.com/feed it works!
#40: 25 March 2009
Dinner at Mizu in TTDI with Desmond, Matthew, Robb and baby.
The container so cute! But you know the dark green leaves in the basket? They look like leaves from the plants we kept indoors when I was younger! So I wonder how they get the supply of leaves. Buy a few plants and pluck their leaves every time someone orders a set dinner wtf.
#41: 26 March 2009
Comparing my shoe and Ron’s! Ron is so big that he makes my fake pink iphone look like a Panadol Menstrual in his hands WTF.
#42: 27 March 2009
I failed T________T
I forgot to take a photo that day T_________T
But to make up for it, I can tell you everything I did that day!
I spent the whole morning in a meeting with a client.
Followed by a 3 hour lunch with same client.
And then rushed back to the office to attend a presentation by Tim & Nicholas. And then checked my emails and made sure nothing was running late..
And then went to 1u for dinner with Cheng Leong and Angeline. (only one hour at office the whole of the day!)
And then got into a fight with Yvonne over who gets the 7pm slot at the lash extension place WTF.
Cos we were both at 1u with time to kill and we were both hurrying to the shop when we bumped into each other.
And she won the fight because she said at least I have Tim to teman her but she has nobody WTF.
#43: 28 March 2009
Bloody Earth Hour.
I’m all for saving the environment and everything.
But I had a terribly exhausting day I swear to god I walked at least 5 km that day carrying kilograms of things so by the time I finally got home I collapsed on the bed without showering (nyehehehe wtf).
When our Macds dinner delivery came also I waved Tim away and asked him to eat first.
I finally woke up at 8.25pm (see my matted hair, smudged eyeliner and Hello Kitty hairclip from KY and Mellissa still stuck in my head) and managed to take a sip of my Coke….
before Tim sang out “It’s Earth Hour!” and turned off all the lights. -_______________-
I remained stubbornly where I was and patted around in the dark for my fries but then he pulled me out onto the balcony to watch the KL Tower go dark.
And then he talked excitedly about Earth Hour and waved his arms and knocked my fry out of my hand T_______T
It was a very nice fry too all oily and juicy the way I like my fries T__________T
And then his maid came out and talked to me so I had to look at her and I bloody missed the KL Tower turnng dark.
So I gave up and went back in to eat my dinner in the dark.
Then when I went to the toilet I forgot and turned on the light by reflex he shouted “WHAT ARE YOU DOING” and turned it off so I had to pee in the dark too.
And most of the houses around us kept their lights on anyway I guess nobody really gives a shit 🙁
*
Other updates before I go to sleep:
I got my name cards!!!
Ok the story is, trainees (under probation for 6 months) in my company are not supposed to have name cards. But the head of our department quietly allocated us all name cards anyway to make things easier for when we meet clients etc.
So one day a few weeks after I started work, I sent an email to the HR to ask where are my name cards. And I managed to CC not just the whole company but the entire group.
Of course I didn’t get my name cards. And as a result, neither did any of the other trainees.
But now that I am confirmed, I received a whole box of brand new name cards the other day!
And I was so excited! I couldn’t wait for a meeting just so I could give someone my name card!
And few days ago we had a meeting!
But then the guy the meeting was with had a terrible reputation of being a hamsap douchebag.
I didn’t want to ruin the memory of my first name-card giving:(((
So in the end I gave my first name card to Desmond. Who is my boss WTF.
If I were a huge pop star…
I would go on stage and sing with a live band.
Oh wait, done that *action
I would get people to close stores for me so I could shop in peace and drink champagne.
OH WAIT I’VE DONE THAT TOO HAHAHAAH
(dunno why picture turned sideways)
I would get someone to do the trash for me /snob
People would take photos of me. And I wouldn’t screw them up!
I would get together with other artistes and sing collaborations wtf.
I would pose on the red carpet for more pictures.
And wear big sunglasses to avoid the glare of the lightbulbs when the papparazi cameras go off.
And get a Korean pop star boyfriend wtf.
And get some singing lessons wtf.
See you guys at the Nuffnang Music Bash!
#38: 23 March 2009
Left Project 365 until the last hour of the day then hurriedly snapped this.
It’s the plaid of the skirt I wore on Monday 😀
#39: 24 March 2009
Desmond (Malaysia’s top 20 blogger wtf) and I got a postcard from Kenny from Ireland! (Although I think he’s back here now)
He went to St James Gate Brewery which apparently is the birth place of Guinness.
Yea yea good joke Kenny maybe I should go back to my motherland and find the pot of gold under the rainbow wtf.
Anyway I got pictures from Masato back when he was here after a whole lot of sweat and tears.
He even called me once from Japan to ask me how to upload pictures on Facebook wtf.
Finally I gave up guiding him through Facebook and told him to use yousendit *choir singing hallelujah wtf
Actually most of his pictures are quite idiotic as if the AIN videos weren’t enough AIH.
Ok la let this post be about Masato and his faces and poses *gives up
When he first arrived =.= Masato swallowing everything in his way wtf. We took him for hawker food. I think he had chicken rice.
I pretty much look like a shitbag wtf because I still hadn’t really recovered from food poisoning and I was so afraid I would need to use the toilet on the way to KLIA to pick him up T______T
Eat again when we got home! This time my parents stuffed him with yee sang. Masato is eating his chopsticks
Masato posing outside Central Market.
Um… Masato doing his single-and-available wink. Girls he is available! And has a good job!
Masato eating egg tart (face quite normal)
Me and Masato ecstatic at yet another CNY
Masato eating soup wtf.
Masato playing mahjong with Goh Wen Loong and Jammie (and Poh Seik) at Latat’s house.
With everyone: Tim, Poh Seik, Wen Loong, Jammie and Derlyn.
God I have no idea why my face is grey-black here! Maybe because I spent the evening camping out in Latat’s toilet worrying that someone would peek in at the window above me wtf because I kept hearing male voices outside. And then I had to wait for like a year to flush the toilet because the pump was so slow.
Masato being a pest and taking pictures of me when I just woke up.
Masato attacking some ducks.
Me introducing the duck restaurant to Masato. (Actually first time here Tim was the one who brought us)
Masato feeling good with Tim at KLCC.
Dinner at San Fransisco Steakhouse.
SuperMasato outside the Twin Towers.
Masato being a pest AGAIN while I was trying to cook us both instant noodles for supper.
Quite fun having him stay over actually! It was like having a sleepover (except that he’s not a girl) cos we stayed up watching stupid videos on Youtube (ie. origin of AIN wtf), telling each other about our relationships and exes although sometimes we struggled and had to use the dictionary to find words.
Only thing missing was that I didn’t paint his nails. And he didn’t hit me with a pillow wtf.
Right before he left for the airport:(
#37: 22 March 2009
Good: Jammie lent me all her Sims CDs!
Bad: Two were corrupted
FML: None are compatible with Windows Vista.
*
My last post was called Pink Chalk because that was the title of a short story I wrote for a creative writing class I took in my sophomore year.
It was based on a true story. I did have friends called Rachel and Nabila. And they did unfriend me.
Not because I refused to lend them my color pencils! But because I got first place in my class and they were jealous and told all the girls not to talk to me wtf.
There was no pink hopscotch map and no kicking little Indian boys in their shins.
There was, however, crying in my bed at night (BECAUSE I HAD NO FRIENDS DAMMIT) and my mother going to see my teacher and then my teacher telling everybody to be friends with Audrey and tadah I had people to spend recess with again wtf.
Rachel is now happily married and a photographer in South Carolina. Nabila is… well I don’t know what Nabila is but there are plenty of pictures of her on Facebook in skimpy clothing with white/mixed men.
Anyway, I wrote what I did because my teacher told me to write about something you really know.
I took that class because I liked writing. And I still do. But back then I remember feeling so nervous about the class because it was filled with strong opiniated American women (ie. English being their first language) with great speaking skills who liked to read aloud their essays and merrily criticized everyone but themselves.
But when we all submitted our final pieces I got an A on mine (and I hardly get As! only A-s). The teacher took me aside and told me this was something I should pursue but then the next semester I went to Japan and when I came back I pushed writing aside and took up Studio Art instead (which got me a fucking B and pulled down my GPA so I couldn’t graduate magna cum laude wtf)
It took me 3 years to decide to post the piece on my blog but one second to take it down.
Because someone said it was stupid and boring *sigh
I like writing a lot. But I’m too scared that I actually suck at it. So I don’t try very hard so that no one can say I tried and failed.
I think I’m too chicken to face rejection and failure more than anything else.
edit: i’m reposting the piece here. thank you to everyone who’s been so encouraging:)
#35: 20 March 2009
Nothing like a fresh healthy start to the day!
Everyone, say hello to my good friend Cholesterol!
Because I think that is what will bring me to my death wtf.
#36: 21 March 2009
Went to the Curve today to look for more um appropriate clothes for work … and found nothing.
In a fit of anger I marched to the salon and got my nails done. And then to the bookstore for more books.
So my day wasn’t wasted:)
I love knowing that there’s a pile of books waiting to be read!
#34: 19 March 2009
Hello Kitty earrings! This was one of the small things I wasted money on when Tim was saying how all the shops selling things like this wouldn’t survive the recession wtf.
But I love them! So cute up close and when you’re far away they look like pearl earrings *delusional cos no money to buy real pearls
Ok I’m sure everyone knows urbandictionary.com right!
But did you know that now it has turned into a platform for people to write either sweet definitions of their own or friends’ names or ridiculously insulting versions of their enemies wtf.
Jammie looked something up on urbandictionary the other day and somehow we started typing in our friends’ names.
princess aud❤ says:
baby
im sure u;d like to know that
ur name according to urban dictionary
means ‘guy with massive schlong’ WTF
Timothy Tiah says:
WHAT?
WHERE
SHOW ME
*princess aud❤ says:
HAHAHAHA
tim
vb. to sex someone up
n. man with a massive schlong
vb.That whore just got timmed
n.You hear about Bob He is tim.
*princess aud❤ says:
TIM 319 up, 121 down love ithate it
An acronym which means:
Tit
In
Mouth
Guy: I like missionary style sex and TIM.
Timothy Tiah says:
fuck that fuck that guy thing
but seriously
MAN
I AM TIM
and i am going to tim u up
*princess aud❤ says:
see 2nd meaning
tim 208 up, 187 down love ithate it
Troubled Insecure Masterbator T.I.M
my name is tim and everything about this is true
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
At first I thought Angela’s definitions were really nice!
| Angela | 128 up, 54 down   |
|
|
a really beautiful and pretty girl that I love Angela is sooooooooooooooooooo pretty!
|
||
Awwwwww.
| Angela | 152 up, 40 down |
|
|
Small, short catlike person. Very easy to tease, but there’s no reason to tease an Angela because they’re very sweet. You can trust an Angela. Often, Angelas need a hug. Give your Angela a hug today. |
||
Double awwwwwww.
But then..
| angela | 89 up, 254 down |
|
|
Gothic Vampiress of small stature from Central Europe last seen around the time of Charlemagne -780 AD. Was known to drink excessivly and when available was found sniffing “Butt”, a locally found glue derivative. |
||
HAHAHAHAHAHHA LIKES TO SNIFF BUTT HAHAHAHAAHAH
Jammie:
| jammie | 3 up, 3 down |
|
|
A gun. Jam with harm. Them boys whooped out they jammies and poped caps in all they asses. |
||
Suet:
| Suet | 2 thumbs down |
|
|
A funny sound used by red neck farmers to call their pigs (mexicans). Suet is the left-over crap that pigs eat…part of why pigs are sooo delicious. Suuuuuet!!! Suuuuet. Come here you damn beanerz. |
||
LEFT OVER CRAP HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAH
Tze’s was quite boring…
| tze | 2 up, 5 down |
|
|
“tze” just like “pfft” or “meh” “i know it better” “tze” |
||
So we looked up her last name.
| pang | 62 up, 29 down |
|
|
The sound a shovel makes when it hits you in the face. That chick is a real pang. |
||
WTF SOUND OF A SHOVEL HAHAHAHAHA actually when you think about it it makes sense that a shovel would go “PANG” when it hits your face hahahahahahaah but who would go write that down hahaahahahahahha
Mine at first was quite nice!
| Audrey | 1254 up, 1104 down |
|
|
A girl who is completely and stunningly beautiful and can take very good myspace pictures. Dude, that girl is so Audrey. |
||
True ok true!
But then…
| audrey | 17 up, 324 down |
|
|
A girl that is extremely beastly. damn look at that audrey, i wonder if she swats fish in rivers |
||
swats fish in rivers HAHAHAHAHAH
| audrey | 985 up, 703 down |
|
|
Vagina and vulva which are unusually audible. Our neighbour Mrs C has the noisiest audrey that we’ve ever heard. There’s a distinct squelching and slurping sound when she walks. She must have an enormous supply of beaver-spit! Fortunately, she’s quite deaf – and, of course, people politely pretend not to notice. There should be a silencer or muffler available, which ladies with audreys could wear inside their pants. |
||
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH FML
#31: 16 March 2009
The belly dancing performance at the MDG party.
I’m sorry but I didn’t like the contestants at all:( I didn’t like their walks, I didn’t like their hair, I didn’t like their makeup and I didn’t like how some of them had absurdly short legs compared to their torsos wtf.
I feel really bad for even saying this but I was very disappointed at the quality. I haven’t watched Season 2 but what I saw that night drew no comparison to Cindy, Ringo and Hanis.
But maybe I’m wrong. Maybe I should give them the benefit of the doubt! Because it’s still early days, and from where I was watching (upstairs) it was further away from the stage so maybe my eyes failed me wtf.
#32: 17 March 2009
Mindy went to Melbourne and got me this! I was so touched cos I know she went back for a week just to settle some issues over there but she still got me this I was so surprised when she handed me the shopping bag thanks Mindy *big shiny eyes
#33: 18 March 2009
I finally got my Guinness St Patrick’s Day hat that I’ve been lusting for!
Racheal got one for all of us and when I wore it Mehlin said she could finally see me above my computer moniter *beaming
I plonked it on Vishal’s head to take this picture. Then I hurriedly snatched it back cos I saw he had a coveting gleam in his eye. I’ll be watching you Vishal *points two fingers at own eyes and points to Vishal
Ok I wanna blog quickly about our Apple Charity Day a few weeks back! Before I forget and the pictures rot in the recesses of my computer forever…
Our supplies fa lice!
Lee Fen’s group did cleaning and housework hahahaah. Here she is cleaning out the printer.
Me with our supplies fa lice.
Me and Nicole. See my hairband it’s an apple! And the four of us decided to wear red to symbolize apples!
Back to Lee Fen and her cleaning duties. She’s found a (rubber) cockroach, the Enemy of our Office.
We tied up the apples with little blue ribbons to make them more presentable! As presents! We weren’t really selling them — we gave them away as thank you gifts when people donated.
Finally we were on our way to visit the first donors. That’s June.
Darren the Driver who had to wait for us a few times when there was no parking.
With the name list. Yalah I was bored cos I wasn’t driving (Darren), making calls (June) or tying apples (Nicole) gawd I am a terrible group member to have ;_;<== following Suet wtf
Nicole tying ribbon.
Me eating WTF seriously I am a waste of space! No la cos I ate too slow and everyone else already finished so I had to bring my food into the car.
Darren said we weighed down his car so badly that his bumper was nearly dragging on the ground -_____-
With Gerald who donated!
Nicole with her boyfriend and his colleague who also all donated.
If you don’t wanna eat your apple, you can always er use it as a paper weight. And then when it rots, you can er use it to throw at your enemy wtf.
A lot of wonderful kind people donated to us! I never thought people could be so generous with their money especially in times like these (yes baby you are one of them wtf) The four of us managed to raise around RM5k in one day (actuallyI forgot the amount wtf but 5k sounds about right) so good job guys!
(Sorry I forgot to find out the orphanages for those who asked =.= Pls leave a comment if you’re still interested in helping out :))
#30: 15 March 2009
Me and Jammie at badminton, sweaty, red faced and quite dejected.
This was taken while we were resting on the sidelines, after being terrorized by Latat and Tim on the badminton courts *dark face
Stupid Tim ok what boyfriend is this! He and Latat asked me to team up with Andrew who is an amazing player so that I could be his handicap! Andrew playing by himself against the two of them was not enough for them, I had to be his partner so I could pull down his performance *staring at floor
And then! Tim proceeded to smash all the balls at me T_______T
And we lost by one point T_______T
*waits for him to read this and make it up to me
Guess what! We are going to play badminton tomorrow.
By play I mean make half hearted attempts to get to the shuttlecock.
I have concluded that I am hopelessly unfit and could be on the verge of a heart attack!!
The other day while transitting in Singapore on the way home from Manila, stupid Tim bluffed me that the gate was closing! And we were still on the other side of the airport!
So I started running. For like all of ten seconds before I shakingly dug out our passports and boarding passes, threw them at him and panted “Save yourself I can’t make it. Run to the gate and tell them to wait for me”
Only later did I find out he was bluffing me and we had 20 minutes to spare *face turning black. You can be sure I gave him a Purple Nurple for that.
So anyway tomorrow we are going to exercise! Me, Jam and a bunch of my lying boyfriend’s friends.
Shit la I feel like I have too many things to blog about but now that they’re all backloaded I don’t feel like blogging about them anymore! I’ve forgotten all I wanna say and all the things that happened my memory sucks!
Actually so do my eyes, hearing and my knees WTF. Old before my time maybe I’m the opposite case of Benjamin Button where I er grow old too fast *scares self
I worry everyday about my eyes ever since starting work cos 10 hours of the day are spent in front of the computer; I can’t hear ANYTHING in movies and I always have to refer to subtitles so whenever I watch pirated DVDs with wrong subtitles I always get the wrong message and misunderstand the story dammit. And also, my knees crack when I squat down wtf.
Anyway, I came home today and saw a letter from JLPT!!!! Results for my Japanese proficiency test!!!!
.
.
.
.
.
I failed.
No need to console me I knew I was going to fail already, just don’t know how badly *waves hand dismissively
Actually I failed by a tiny margin (passing mark is 60% and I got 55%) so at least I know I’m only um 45% stupid…
But my soulmate is successful enough for the both of us!
She got into Stanford for grad school! Yay for her! Everybody congratulate her! I will now live vicariously through her and experience a grad student’s life (have no money to go myself boohoo) because we are so close that we have uhhh telepathy *convinces
.
#27: 12 March 2009
Actually I cheated *head bowed. This picture wasn’t taken on 12 March, it was taken when we were in Malacca and I bought this adorable icecream pen and a tape dispenser shaped like a strawberry jelly donut.
I was meaning to take a photo of myself using the pen at work but I forgot. What! Work very busy ok and I don’t simply take time out to do useless activities like take photos (hoping boss is reading)
So just use this picture to show you my super cute stationery.
Anyway I just realized today that cute useless stationery and other small things will be the death/bankruptcy of me, not clothes! Amazing revelation, this.
Like today we passed by Presents4Them in 1U (the store that sells all small cute stuff – stuffed toys, Hello Kitty merchandise, stickers, stationery, accessories, etc) and Tim said “you know, these kind of shops won’t last during a recession cos nobody is gonna buy rubbish like this.”
I said “yea…” while looking at the Presents4Them shopping bag in my hand WTF.
#28: 13 March 2009
It rained so heavily! June came in with this gloriously ginormous umbrella and it was so big that everyone had to ask me to pose with it because of the big contrast (Midget vs. Khloe Kardashian’s umbrella WTF)
It was also Guinness’s St Pats carnival yesterday so some of us dropped by to take a look. That’s Darren, Racheal, Edmund and Desmond, one of Malaysia’s top 20 bloggers WTF.
Another photo.
Desmond is so fehmes that his advertorials cost USD 1,500 WTF
I also went to get lash extensions! Yvonne told me about this place Glitters in 1U that does really good extensions for quite cheap so I went! (One of my readers Yonghsin saw us heading there and this is the reason why)
Errr and if you’re wondering why Tim is wearing a different colored shirt…. it’s because he changed clothes! Yes that’s it! He changed!
No actually this was the next day *shamefaced. Sorry to all my friends. That is if you still want to be my friend wtf. It was because I bought this pink shirt in Manila and I really really liked it! I like plaid shirts in general just that sometimes it can be a bit hard to pull off because you tend to look like a trucker/lumberjack.
Anyway I had only brought this other yellow top to wear and suddenly I didn’t like that top wtf and I felt like I hadn’t gotten enough wear from the pink shirt so I decided to rewear it and hope nobody notices. But now I’ve gone and burst my own illusion by posting this picture damn myself.
It’s clean ok! I don’t sweat!
Before picture. Taken 6 months ago but rest assured my eyelashes haven’t changed length since.
#29: 14 March 2009
Tadah! With no makeup on at all! Why haven’t I gotten extensions before!
Side view.
This is so great! I’ve been worrying a lot about my eyelashes thinning because I wear mascara everyday (alongside worrying about my eyes, ears and knees) so I think this will be a good change from daily mascara!
(Shaddup I don’t wanna hear about how lash extensions make your own lashes drop)
Plus I don’t think I even need to put on makeup now when I go out so convenient! Can just roll out of bed, brush teeth, get dressed and head out. Good investment! Do you know how important sleep is!
Are you still not convinced? (Forgive the eyebags they are the bane of my existence) Do you want me to show you an ugly picture of me without lash extensions?
After the jump so this blog can still remain G-rated.
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