edit: this was written halfway last night before I got too sleepy to continue đ
Twas the night before Christmas /
When all through the house /
Not a creature was stirring /
Not even a mouse.
So apt!
It’s Christmas (really early in the) morning and I’m sitting in bed with my laptop propped up on my knees.
Wombeh’s gone back to Penang for the holidays and my parents are strictly Buddhist so we don’t celebrate Christmas at home.
I contemplated going clubbing on Christmas eve but let’s face it I’m getting more and more uncool the more times goes by wtf.
I’m actually perfectly happy to stay home and do nothing, considering how hectic the last coupla weeks have been for me. Â That will be my Christmas present to myself wtf.
But because I’m greedy wtf this here’s a list of 25 things (because I’m 25) I want for Christmas. Â Or for next year. Â Either way I’m not too bothered wtf.
1. TO FINISH PAYING OFF MY LOAN
This totally deserves to be #1. Â I’ve decided that I’m not going to dawdle around for the next 10 years paying off my loan every quarter and losing 8% interest every time fuck this shit. Â Imma put every single spare cent I earn from now on to my loan and hopefully pay it off faster and skip the bloody interest T_T Â Which brings me to my second point…
2. Not buy anything designer until my loan is paid off T_T
Was quite tempted to buy certain very expensive bags a few months ago but totally cannot justify to myself why I should spend so much money on a thing that carries other things when I still have a loan hanging above my head đ Thankfully I don’t like bags that much wtf.
3. A Hello Kitty polaroid camera
But don’t take my word for this because my attention span will probably allow me to be busy with it for approx 3 weeks then it’ll collect dust somewhere in the house wtf.
3. To not grow any older amen.
4. To not grow any fatter amitabha.
5. To actually plan my birthday wtf
I don’t remember a birthday after age 12 where I planned to have a birthday party D: Â I think it goes back to when I was younger, my birthday was always somewhere near Chinese New Year so often my friends or classmates wouldn’t be able to come to my party because they were back in their hometowns (or I’d be back in Penang) fml. Â So there were at least a couple of times where I had nobody at my birthday party WTF. Â And then my mother would try to make up the numbers (and make sure the food doesn’t go to waste wtf) by asking my brother’s friends and their siblings wtf.
So either I have an irrational fear of nobody turning up to my birthday party or I have an irrational dislike of pooling together different groups of friends wtf. Â I dunno why! Â You know when you were a kid all your friends were people in your class. Â But now that I’m old(er) my friends come from all directions – friends from school, friends from work, friends from blogging, friends from The Club wtf. Â Nobody knows each other well. Â And I’m damn lazy to bring everyone together and play host and make sure nobody’s left out yadda yadda.
I’m so lazy I should be reborn as a worm wtf.
The parties that I’ve had after that were all surprise parties planned by people who love me <3 So maybe this year I’d like a proper party with the people in my life where I’m fully prepared (and thus well dressed with nice makeup wtf). Â Yea what I want for Christmas is a birthday party wtf.
6. Â A trip back to Kyoto
Preferably in time to catch ăăă season đ
7. More time to myself
I’d like more time away from my workstation to do the things that I want to do. Â Like travel more (if you hadn’t noticed, I used up all my leave this year when I went back to the States FTS. Â Then suffered through the rest of the year. Â And now my leave count is at -2 WTF took advance leave from next year without knowing it wtf). Â More time to put more effort into my blog which is dying a boring death. Â More time to write – and not just in my blog. Â More time to read real books – not just Jodi Picoult however much I love her -_-
8. Â A new Blackberry data cable
Cos I lost mine T_T
9. To get 100 points on Scramble by myself WTF
Fat Her, Mumsy and I have been addicted to this stupid game recently on Mumsy’s iPad -_- Â Unfortunately we can only get more than 50 or 100 if we team up and play together đ Â Playing solo 50 also hard to reach aih what to do all of us got the same brain genes.
10. To be done with this list WTF.
I dunno why I was so ambitious say 25 things! Â In writing this list I’ve come to realize that I’m not very materialistic. Â Only got 2 material items that I want! Â The rest are experiences or wishful thinking wtf. Â I mean I shop a lot wtf and I buy many things without thinking much but I don’t really crave material items if I don’t buy something I won’t mind that much either. Â God I’m so detached I’m halfway to nirvana.
But nirvana is the wrong religious celebration and wrong season for now. Â Now is the season to be jolly so Merry Christmas everyone! Â And Happy Hanukkah wtf.
And the hits just keep on coming.
A couple of nights ago, before my virgin hot air balloon experience (that wasn’t to be), Wombeh and I went to Eric‘s new house to fix our Blackberries. Â One of Wombeh’s keys was stuck and I dropped mine until scratched already so I wanted to change housings.
I also had an aching bladder wtf.
So as soon as I got to Eric’s place I faster located the bathroom and rushed in to pee.
I pushed the button on the doorknob to lock but it didn’t seem to work. Â I thought it’s ok la new house and they know I’m in the toilet anyway don’t need to lock.
So after peeing (and washing my hands ahem) I twisted the doorknob to go out.
Or at least I tried to. Â The lock broke WTF T___________T
Feeling stupid, I knocked politely on the door wtf and said “Hello I’m locked in the toilet” WTF.
Thankfully Eric came to try to open the door. Â I think Wombeh was still drunk (cos we were at a Guinness party before that wtf) and was still lolling around on Eric’s couch fml.
Unfortunately Eric couldn’t unlock the door even with the key. Â Wombeh finally caught up to what was going on and rattled the doorknob hard to get it to open.
I heard Eric say “eh eh don’t break my door” double FML.
I had visions of sleeping in the toilet and taking emergency leave the next day T____________T But at the same time I wanted to laugh also cos why so stupid wan the things that happen to me!!! Even toilets hate me wtf.
In the end, I had to climb out of the toilet window triple FML.
Bathroom windows are normally located quite high up near the ceiling right.
So Eric passed me a what looked like a metal kitchen shelf to climb on and then out of the window quadruple FML.
Eric’s house was still new and the floor was unfinished so I was wearing my shoes in the bathroom! Â Had to take them off and pass them out of the window first wtf.
Then climb on the metal shelf like I’m a convict in Prison Break fck this shit.
(btw my pants nice ornot from minimaos wan commercial break wtf but I love them so old school!)
The window is damn small ok! Â And I was terrified I would fall cos the window was also pretty high up.
Got Wombeh to save me! <3 And Eric to help me take photos WTF this incident so ridiculous don’t blog also cannot.
Very hard ok have to do all sorts of acrobatics and gymnastics!
When I climbed up there I naturally poked my head out of the window first. Â Then I had to squeeze myself so I could stick out my legs too.
If not I would just fall headfirst out of the window *fear
Anyway thank god I am four feet nine because if I was any bit taller (and any less flexible – and I am actually damn flexible wtf) I wouldn’t have been able to squeeze my head and my legs out of the window at the same time!
Really this is the first time I’m so grateful to be this height T3T
Anyway freedom ăăŁă!!
And all for the love of my (new looking) Blackberry!! It’s still pink but I changed the keypad to white so the rainbow backlight is brighter.
Pink and white housing and pink angel case from Blackberryhousing.
And most importantly, I didn’t have to spend my life holed up in somebody’s bathroom wtf.
God I’ve been so busy that it’s been a whole week since I last blogged T______T
It’s Christmas and the end of the year so I’ve been swimming in year end events and Christmas parties and movie screenings….ok la I’m not bragging wtf.
Cannot stand leaving my blog unupdated so here’s a recent pic of me wtf.
Mickey 2 piece combo from minimaos!
Oooooh and I had my first ever ride in a hot air balloon today! *big shiny eyes
I’ve always wanted to go on a hot air balloon! Â Well ever since I watched Up anyway wtf.
(the hot air balloon was from Taylor’s Open Day Wombeh should be blogging about it soon)
Us! Â We’d waited for 4 different parties to go up before us and I was so excited!
There’s a hole in the wicker for you to stick your foot in and use as a ledge to climb into the basket.
And the burner they had is damn powerful and hot! Â It blew out flames like a dragon wtf which it had to obviously because the balloon is huge and if the air isn’t hot enough it won’t rise.
So hot that I would have sweated buckets… if not for the fact that as soon as we went up 1 foot off the ground, the wind started blowing and the balloon people said it was too windy and dangerous…
and asked us to get off WTF.
Didn’t get to ride it after that cos they closed it off FML T____________T
So there goes my virgin hot air balloon experience. A balloon that went up 30 centimeters in the air wtf.
Kudos to Taylors and the ballooners for being so stringent on safety… but that will always be my memory of my first time on a hot air balloon.
Thanks Weather God wtf.
Because I’m the laziest blogger in the world, I dug out an old entry I wrote a few years ago about what cosmetic products and makeup I use. Â And now I’m going to reuse it because I obviously don’t use the same products anymore wtf and a lot of people have been asking what makeup I use!
Ok before I start, let me say that I noticed some differences in my skincare routine T_T I am two years older when I first blogged about this at age 23 and this year I noticed that I’m starting to develop fine lines around my eye area T_T
So I’ve upped the ante now on eyecare products T_T They’re not that noticeable yet, only when I go so close to the mirror that my nose nearly touches it, but an early start is always best. Â To everyone younger than me who’s reading this, don’t take your skin’s youth for granted wtf.
Ok here goes. Â The answers in pink are from two years ago – for comparison’s sake đ
And all my pictures are stolen from Google so if they disappear don’t be surprised wtf.
Skin Care
What facial cleanser do you use?
Benefit You Clean Up Nice! face wash. Â Bought it like two years ago and still cannot finish wtf think my face is too small. Â It’s ok la nothing special about it but it gets the job done – not very drying but not moisture retentive either.
What toner do you use?
Hada Labo! Â Blogged about it a while back.
What moisturizer do you use?
I’m as anal about moisturization as I am about eye care.  I was using Kanebo before this and switched to Shiseido The Skincare range.  I remember Suet using it  a few years ago and she said it was good so I decided to try it out too.  Quite good very moisturizing, definitely better than Clinique or Kanebo (my usual products).
There’s a bottle for day AND night. Â The night one is more moisturizing, while the day one has SPF 15 for you lazy people who like to skip your sunblock wtf.
What eyecream do you use?
Avene Eluage Eye contour care.
Mummy Ooi recommended it cos she said it visibly reduces fine lines when applied. Â It does la but after a few hours I can see my fine lines again T_______T
But then there is…
Odbo Wrinkletox Serum. Â I got this in Korea and they call it “natural Botox” because finishing up eight small bottles of this will give you wrinkle free skin for two years wtf. Â I’m a bit skeptical la but bought it anyway T_T
I’ve been using it for only two days but it really does actively reduce wrinkles lor! Â My eye area now looks like a baby’s butt WTF. Â But let me use it longer and get back to you on its effectiveness.
How many times a day do you wash your face?
Twice! I am damn anal about this and will never wash more or less. Youâre not supposed to okay! Even if youâre in humid Malaysia or a the Gobi desert wtf you should only wash your face TWICE a day.
My answer remains wtf.
Do you use eye makeup remover?
What nonsense is this of course! Itâs a sin to leave your makeup on mmmkay.
If so, What kind?
Etude House Mascara Remover. Â Got this in Seoul too and it’s damn good! Removes mascara super well and damn cheap some more, so cheap I can’t even remember how much it was wtf. Â Like RM6 or something.
Is your skin oily, dry, or combination skin?
Dry and sensitive 
Always get allergy this allergy that.
What is the best part about your skin?
That itâs clear la wtf. No pimples, blackheads, freckles, age spots wtf. (not yet anyway) But got fine lines already FMLLLLLLLLL
What are your skin problems?
That it gets dark easily la I spend my life shying away from sunlight T_T And eyebags and dark circles *frets
FINE LINES! FINE LINES!
What sunblock do you use?
Shiseido Anessa Perfect Smooth Sunblock. SPF 50++ okay I swear their biggest customer is Mrs Dracula wtf. Or Japanese women. But you should never go anywhere without putting on sunblock! Even if youâre staying at home, sunblock is a must okay do you know how damaging the sun is.
I was going to say same!!!! And that I’m a loyalist wtf but I realized there’s a slight difference – the one I’m using now is Perfect PEARLY Sunscreen, not Perfect Smooth wtf but it’s still from the Shiseido Anessa range so same la! Â I don’t know where to get this sunblock here though – I just stock up every time I’m in Japan.
Makeup
What foundation do you use?
Face Shop QUick & Clean BB cream! Â Good, cheap and easy to apply. Â Plus supposed to be better for your skin than foundation ok foundation ages your skin *obsessive
What powder do you use?
Clinique. I bought this 4 years ago and I have no idea why itâs still nearly full! Actually I do, itâs because half the time I forget to use powder *shifty-eyed.
My Clinique powder never finished! Â In the end I think I lost it WTF. Â So I went out and got…
Christian Dior loose powder. Â I actually have no idea what it’s called but I googled it and it looks like this wtf. Â Does a great job of setting my BB cream đ
What eyebrow pencil do you use?
Lancome Le Crayon Brow Definer. I never knew the full name until I googled it wtf.
Canât find a picture of it, but Canmake Eyebrow Mascara (Japanese brand) in blond, to make sure my brows match my hair>.>
Put aside the Lancome pencil cos the color doesn’t match my hair now wtf.
Coincidentally I now use Canmake Liquid Eyebrow! Â I usually love liquid pens for eyebrows but this one seemed to dry up damn fast! Â Like the first time I used it WTF I dunno was it cos it absorbed up all my BB cream or something -_- It was good while it lasted though and I haven’t gotten round to buying a new one.
Koji Linequeen Eyebrow Mascara to further tint my brows to match my brows – that is only on days I remember / am hardworking enough to put it on. Â Bottle still looks full wtf.
What eyeliner do you use?
MAC Fluidline dunno what hahaha Iâm just typing out what I see in the picture wtf. Dunno why Iâm so bad at remembering product names. I havenât used this for ages though because Iâm too lazy to wash my brush wtf.
Interestingly, from gel eyeliner I moved to liquid eyeliners and then recently went back to gel liners! Â Liquid eyeliners tend to fade out or smudge on my eyes and gel liners seem to work best for me. Â This one is called Shiseido Maquillage Dramatical (grammatical fail wtf) Gel Liner and it comes with its own mini brush! Â It’s black with glitter in it and if you’re looking for staying power and darkness go for gel eyeliners đ
(Just realized I got so many stuff from Shiseido, must be my underground favorite brand wtf)
What is your favorite eyeshadow?
Revlon Eyeglide Shimmer Shadow wtf. (again typing out from google) Itâs only my favorite cos I use the pink or the gold for day use. Looks more finished!
God I remember how I loved those shadows T_T Â Now I usually use Majolica Majorca or Canmake.
What mascara do you use?
Loreal Double Extension and Lancome Hypnose both in black. But Loreal kicks Hypnoseâs ass okay the first time I used Hypnose it was Mascara God wtf, but the next time I bought it again I felt like the quality worsened. Plus I love mascaras that come with the strenghtening volumising white base.
I hardly use mascaras anymore! I actually used the Loreal Double Extension for many years but then now I switched to mostly fake lashes cos I’m too lazy to remove makeup after and mascara is the biggest bitch to remove >((
For lashes, Dolly Wink and Diamond Lashes.
But I still use Majolica Majorca’s Lash Expander Frame Plus and Lash Bone.
What are your favorite lipbalms/glosses/sticks?:
Vaseline wtf. I hate stuff on my lips and I used to be allergic to lip glosses T_T
Still relevant wtf.
Hair
Do you color your hair?
No itâs natural wtf. Of course I do!
What is your stylists name?
Raymond Chew!!!!
What salon do you go to?
Wherever Raymond goes wtf.  Followed him from A Cut Above to Shunji Matsuo to Shawn Cutler and now he’s opening a new salon this week.  Will update when I visit him next week. 
What is your natural hair color?
Black la but a very crappy black. A not black at all black wtf.
What is your hair color now?
Pudding head wtf.
Do you have straight or curly hair?
Straight until dunno what I can go crazy wtf.
Do you use a curling iron?
Yes! My beloved Conair.
Still Conair! Â Except now I’m using the 2.5 inch diameter one.
A straightener?
No.
Do you use a blowdryer?
Of course! For volume. (wtf this is the longest tag ever sien already)
Do you use gel and if so, what kind?
Nope.
Do you use mousse, and if so, what kind?
Nope. I use hair wax and hair spray. Both from Gatsby and they are better than sex wtf.
Still use wax and spray only! Â Wax is Moving Rubber Air Rise from Gatsby, but the spray is a miracle wtf. Â It’s basically wax in a can and Angela took me to get it from a Japanese salon in San Fran. Â It’s called Spice Shower wtf.
What shampoo do you use?
I donât remember WTF. I alternate between an orange bottle and a gray one wtf.
Dove Intense Therapy! Â Blogged about it before.
What conditioner do you use?
Ditto.
Do you use leave in conditioner?
(whatâs leave in conditioner wtf)
Scents
What deodorant do you use?
I donât need deodorant! I smell like a flower naturally wtf.
What body wash do you use?
Dunno. Dettol? God this part is so boring can I skip it.
Do you use a loofah, washcloth or soap to wash?
I once bought a pink loofah but never used it wtf.
What perfumes do you use or like? Name five.
I donât use perfumes! Cos I told you la I already smell good naturally wtf. I think I always smell like my body wash la wtf. Also, I have almost no sense of smell (thatâs why Iâm made to do trash T_T) so perfumes and colognes are wasted on me.
Do you always have to smell good?
I have Audrey smell ok. Audrey Smell = orange soap smell + Body Shop Satsuma Body Butter. Or trash smell right after I do trash T_____________________T
FML. Thank god I don’t smell like trash anymore
Jewelry
Are diamonds really a girlâs best friend?
I’m not really a girl T_______T
What is your jewelry essential?
Errrrrrrrrrrrrr dunno
What jewelry do you wear most?
The gold necklace with the key pendant Mummy Ooi gave me for my birthday.
I took it off last year for safekeeping and don’t wear any jewelry on a daily basis anymore!
What jewelry do you crave most?
Am I really still doing this tag why so long wan T__________T Dunno la engagement ring la wtf.
WTF I wrote that when I was still young and naive. Â I don’t crave an engagement ring ok *hyperventilates
Purses and Shoes
How many purses do you own?
Very few. I would be happy not carrying bags okay I remember how my mother had to nag me to put my wallet and phone and whatnot into a bag.
Ok I have more now wtf. Â I know a lot of girls have different bags to match each occasion and outfit (ie. Angela, Ringo..) but I usually carry one bag for ages just because I’m too lazy to move my belongings from one bag to another.
Which is your favorite?
Plastic bag wtf.
How many shoes do you own?
20-30?
Probably more now…
Which pair is your favorite?
Match outfit la! But if Iâm travelling, my cowboy boots. Most comfortable pumps would be the black ones with the gold clasp in front.
I had to put my beloved cowboy boots to sleep it’s heel came off T_T Regret not buying that pair I saw in Myeondong with Cheesie now T3T But right now if I’m traveling it’s the fringed suede boots that Wendy and Cheesie got for me in Tokyo <3
Also my lavender heels with the tiny orange pompoms I got in Tokyo… and my Bebe flipflops…. why you ask me to decide on this impossible wtf.
Who is your favorite handbag designer?
I told you I donât like bags T_____T Petaling Street designer wtf. Oh wait I forgot about Vuitton Speedy Damier in Azur wtf. Let me work 10 years to buy that wtf.
I have grown up! Miu Miu wtf. Â I like bags now more but still not more than shoes! Â I promised myself I wouldn’t buy any luxury items until after I’ve paid off my loan *brave
Who is your favorite shoe designer?
Dunno.
This or that;
Manolos or Jimmy Choos?
Jimmy Choo la. But thatâs only because heâs a family friend. But family friend also whatâs the point never give me any shoes also! Only give my mother and her sisters *sour
Dolce and Gabbana or Chanel?
ENOUGH LA WHY SO MANY QUESTIONS BUT I CHOOSE CHANEL
Micheal Kors or Bebe?
Bebe la damn cute okay.
Louis Vuitton or Coach?
Vuitton la Vuitton. Are you happy wtf.
Gucci or Prada?
I choose Audrey.
Miscellaneous
Favorite Magazine to read?
Vivi, CanCam, Smash Hits WTF.
VIVI!!!
Favorite nail polish?
Cheap ones.
Any nail polish that is applied by someone else *lazy
Favourite Book?
Can we talk favorite authors! Stephen King, Sophia Kinsella, Emily Dickinson (cos she went to Mt Holyoke wtf), Jeffrey Archer, Ken Follett, Jane Austen, Francine Pascal WTF.
I think everything there still applies. Â Oh ya and Jodi Picoult!
Favorite Band?
911 wtf.
KOBUKURO AND THE BEATLES SO EASY
Favorite Girly Movie?
Mean Girls, Legally Blond, My Fair Lady wtf.
Lazy to answer.
Are you high maintenence?
pffffft of course not can someone whose favorite food in the world is Hainanese Chicken Rice be high maintenance wtf.
*looks at Wombeh
Do you enjoy being a girl?
Yes, I like being able to sit down and pee.
DONE!!! What makeup do you use? Or like?
Wah so many questions! Â Some more all require long answers. Â Ok before even more come in and I get too lazy… here are my answers. Â This is going to be the longest blog post ever I can foresee it.
But why some of you cheat wan ask more than one question wtf *stares at Suet
Chi: what is the worst thing you have ever done ? >:3
Actually I’ve been quite lucky because I don’t think I’ve ever had the chance to do something really bad which I would regret later. Â But if I had the chance to do something, I’d cause it so that this certain person I know goes to jail. Â Or loses his job and is ruined financially wtf.
Fiionx Tell us about your love story !!
Haha actually I’ll save this for a future blog post. Â I promise!
amy: audrey do you like to sing ? are you one of those people who hogs the mic during karaoke sessions and try to sing every song you know or are you one of those people who just hides in the corner and chow down on the free buffet and listen to other people sing ?
Fml I think I’m actually one of those people who’d hog the microphone if I could. Â I usually prefer it if maximum 4 people go karaoke together so there’s higher chance of everyone having a mic of their own wtf. Â I can’t even read or speak Chinese but I’ll try to sing along anyway even if it happens to be a Chinese song -_-
Diamante: aud. what do u think about plastic surgery? and will you ever consider it in the future?
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with cosmetic surgery! Â I’ll for sure get Botox done when I’m old T_T And once in a while I consider recutting my double eyelids wtf because I don’t like that the creases too close to the edge and when I put eyeliner they look like they’re not there. Â I heard you can get it done for like RM800 at a clinic in Midvalley if anyone is interested wtf.
Coco:Â Some of the books you like to read please!
I read alot of crap and unintelligent books!  Anything by Stephen King, Sophie Kinsella, Jodi Picoult, Roald Dahl…  But top three are The Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett, The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini and… Vivi WTF.
candy: what is your biggest fear?
I used to say it was the dentist, ghosts and my mother WTF. Â But really my biggest fear is mediocrity. Â Having an average mediocre unfantastic life đ
Violacea Levi: What is your occupation? Apart from you being a âspyâ, what do you do? Youâve got qualifications on Asian studies. So, is that part of your job qualification?
You stalk me on Facebook!! Hahaha sorry I wish I could say but I can’t đ However I can tell you it’s not anything in finance or accounting or boring things like that wtf. Â And I don’t work in Nuffnang wtf.
What country would you like to visit, that you havent already been to?
I’ve never been to Europe! Â But I’ve never really really wanted to go also dunno why. Â Ok either Europe…or Egypt!
What is in your purse?
Maybe I’ll do a whole picture blog post on this đ
What is the last book you read?
I’m reading The Perfect Match by Jodi Picoult on Kindle now!
What is the last song you listened?
I Can Hear The Bells from the musical Hairspray wtf
What is your favorite television show?
GLEE!!!! Also Desperate Housewives.
Do you like snow?
Not really wtf. Â I mean it’s pretty when it’s falling and everything’s covered in white. Â But then it gets slushy or turns brown and disgusting and slippery. Â Plus it’s cold wtf. Â The only time I’d like snow is if school is canceled cos of it wtf.
Jasmine: I wanna know your horoscope! Let me guess, Gemini?
Aquarius! How come you thought I was a Gemini? Most of my best friends are Geminis though đ
Joline:Â What is the happiest moment of your life?
The entire year I was in Japan đ
What is your worst moment?
When I found out my ex had another girl behind my back -_- Thought I might actually die from the pain wtf.
How can you stay so skinny wtf?
I chalk it up to the frequent diarrhea I get WTF. Â Actually I don’t know I think it’s just high metabolism which will probably slow down soon đ
Cee:Â when, where, how do you guys âThe Clubâ met and know each other? You guys bonded with each other so well. <3
The official story is that I met Suet cos she was dating my brother. Â And I met Tze because our exes were friends. Â Jam’s boyfriend Latat was also Tze’s good friend and she introduced Jam to me and Suet. Â The real story is that everything I just said is true except the Tze part. Â Tze and I read each other’s blogs and became friends wtf.
AP: i wanna hear u bitch abt your relationship wtf no la sorry tim! u guys seem amazing together its just that it sounds like uâve suffered alot of trauma in past relationships and im kinda subject to trauma now and have no one to bitch to no comfort no solace wtf
Tell you first – whatever that guy is doing and wherever he ends up in the future, he’ll never find anyone better than you and you’ll always find someone better. Â True story wtf.
Kehrol: how much do you love me wtf
THIS MUCH!
Rebecca: would u give up your cuteness to be taller if given a choice? 
Actually a lot of people have asked me that! Â And the answer is no đ Although I have gotten a lot of flack over my height my whole life, I wouldn’t trade it in because it’s one of the things that make me special đ Or so I think wtf. Â If I grew an extra 5 inches I’d still only be 5’2 and everyone is 5’2! Â If only I was a foot taller then maybe la wtf.
Jazmint:Â for a short person, what do u do to make sure u stand out and everybody notices u?
People already probably notice you because you’re short đ
KY: tell us if tim snores a lot or not and how do u combat it!
Haha thank god Tim doesn’t snore! Yet… If he does I don’t notice cos I sleep like a dead person.
Xiu: wad kind of facial/cosmetic products do u use?
Can I make a full blog post out of this too? đ
Suraya: Was there any comments in the past post that really made you cry?
Nope but I did get very very angry and sad at times. Â The comments themselves didn’t really bother me especially if they were just calling me short cos I don’t mind that. Â But I got upset cos I’d wonder why people who didn’t know me in person at all would hate me so much to go to all that trouble to think of and leave hate comments to try to hurt me.
SJ: were you always this confident and cute wtf. were there any turning points in your life that changed any big part of you?
No I wasn’t! Â Apparently as a toddler I was, but when I got to kindergarten and primary school it was a new (Malay speaking) environment and I lost my confidence and became very shy. Â The first turning point was in Standard 6 (age 12) when I realized I was very good at being funny WTF. I realized that I could use jokes to make an impression on people. Â Then when i finished Form 5 and went to college for pre-u, I met new people that I hadn’t grown up with, people who actually thought I was pretty so I became damn confident after that wtf. Â So if you’re in high school right now and feel like ugly or unpopular, do not give a shit because things will only get better đ
Liz: Your makeup collection + how to draw eyeliner tutorial. i really hope you can do this one >_<
Ok I do new blog post!
Daph: did you and do you still wish that you were taller?
Not really, but at one point in high school I might have. Â I heard a boy say that I was nice but too bad I was so short. Â Life is funny because he later became my first boyfriend wtf.
Joshualaw: Do I look cute as well? wtfâŚ.*cover face with both hands* XD
Yes!
Writer’s block!
You can think of ideas instead wtf.
Ask me a question and I will answer!
Unless it’s too disgusting or intrusive or something. Â And evil comments about my loved ones will not be tolerated wtf.
If nobody asks me questions, I’ll just make questions up and ask myself WTF *nuts
For instance,
Audrey, why is it that you don’t like to share food?
Yea, I’m known at work for being – besides the girl who eats a lot wtf – the girl who doesn’t like to share food fml. Â And the food I especially hate to share is fries.
When I’m out for a meal with other people, I get uncomfortable when they suggest to order a lot of small dishes and everyone shares (when it’s not Chinese food). Â First of all, I have this fear that everyone will eat and there won’t be enough food for me WTF think I was a famine victim in my last life. Â And secondly, I just wanna eat whatever I order ok! If I wanted to eat your dish I’d order it myself thanks wtf.
I think it’s because when growing up, Fat Her (who is an Olympic speed eater) would always finish his food damn fast and then either eat up all the dishes in the middle…or steal bits of food off my plate until I got angry to the point of tears WTF. Not that he wanted to starve his offspring la I think he just automatically wants to put something into his mouth as long as he’s still sitting at the table -_- Â Â Worst was whenever we went out for fast food, he’d always order something ala carte while Ooib and I would order meal sets. Â Then when he finished he’d eat up all my fries which happens to be my favorite part of fast food meals – I’d save them to eat for last but Fat Her would keep eating them while I was preoccupied with my burger wtf.
So this probably explains why I hate sharing food. Â Either that or I’m just plain selfish wtf.
Ok Imma wait for questions! *nervous wtf
You’ve all read news articles and opinion pieces about how some of the British people are complaining that the Royal Family is becoming irrelevant and is extra on the tax, a drain on the country’s resources etc etc.
Whatever.
Be thankful you only have royal family as opposed to us Malaysians FOL.
How many do we have? 9 kings or something like that?
Actually I have nothing against our sultans.
What I DO have a problem with is the fact that in this country, people with certain titles, or people who are deemed VIPs are given preferential treatment in public over that of ordinary, voting, taxpaying citizens.
[VIPs are Very Important People as deemed by I don’t know who and the VIPs in Malaysia are – trust me – VERY VIP. Although I dunno why.]
If any one’s titles should be abolished, it should be the titles conferred to people “who have apparently done something grand” like all the datukships, datuk seri-ships and what not lor! To be specific, people who got datukship and then act like they’re king and better than everyone else.
For non-Malaysians, read here for more information about what Malay titles are about. Similar to the knighthoods that people get in England I suppose. Â But tell you first, you read the whole Wiki article also you won’t find out why someone would be awarded a title besides honoring them but then you don’t get to know why and how someone would be deemed eligible for a title. Â Maybe it’s kept intentionally vague for a reason. Â Maybe because it’s possible to purchase a datukship instead of being awarded it on merit wtf. Â I’m just saying.
While I understand that titles are given to people as a sign of respect and appreciation that they have been tremendously successful in their field, or done some great good, a good amount of them (not all, but enough to be irritating) somehow don’t know how to spell or something and think that D-A-T-U-K is pronounced as god and thus they can do anything they want.
Like for example, clog up our streets when they roar past us suffering ordinary citizens in their nice cars with the special metal plaques on their license plates, with their bodyguards/escorts/bouncers zipping in front and behind them on motorcyles, halting traffic so their masters can pass serenely by.
Similarly, the other day when I got back from Korea, I touched down to find that the Aerotrain (that connects the terminals) still wasn’t working. Â Btw why does it take so damn long to maintain an aerotrain?! It may be at the airport but doesn’t mean it’s a plane what wtf that hard ah.
So we had to take buses to get to the main terminal where baggage claim and immigration is.
The buses were coming quite quickly but there was still a huge line to get on the buses because duh it’s an international airport.
I was in line for like 5-10 minutes when I noticed a bunch of people walking quickly from the side to the beginning of the line.
Disclosure: I’m super anal about line cutters so I notice very fast if someone tries to cut lines. Â I have a whole album of pictures of people who have cut my line taken so I can expose them on my blog WTF *crazy. Â Maybe I’ll post them all one day.
Anyway those people cutting line at the airport were doing it so blatantly! Â They dragged their expensive looking carryons behind them and walked with their heads up high. Â Normally line cutters will do it stealthily, while pretending they don’t know what a shitty thing they’re doing wtf.
But no! Â These people damn proud! Â That’s when I realized ….they were escorted by men in turquoise airport uniform jackets *narrows eyes.
And the woman (actually it was just a woman and two men) was wearing shoulder pads and had big hair! Â The sure sign of a datin.
They got to the start of the line with the help of those two airport staff. Â And boarded a bus right away. Â And the airport staff didn’t let anyone get on the same bus! Â A bus that probably seats like 20 or 30 people! Â They drove away happily while everyone else (INCLUDING IMPRESSIONABLE TOURISTS I MIGHT ADD) continued to waste more time and wait for the next bus.
Well I dunno maybe they HAD to get a bus right away and couldn’t let anybody else take the same bus because they were carrying a bomb that needed to be detonated far away…
That’s the best reason I can think of lor.
Every other reason in that context would suck! So what if you’re a datuk or some important person! Â What’s so important that you can’t wait for the bus like any other normal person? Â And even if you got the bus, why can’t you do a good deed and SHARE the damn bus?? The ride is less than two minutes plus you got on first so you already have a seat!
And this is precisely why I hate this stupid abuse of title-ship or cronyism or whatever it was that happened there. Â I can’t be sure that those people got preferential treatment because they had a title and I’m just making assumptions based on stereotypes.
But to be honest, the stereotype wouldn’t exist if there wasn’t some truth in it.
If titles didn’t exist, people wouldn’t have an official method to say “hello my time is important because I have a title and therefore am entitled to cut your line/traffic lane”
I don’t understand why the need for it though. Â Why do you need to use a title to acknowledge a person’s achievements because the way I see it, if you’ve done something really good, people would know anyway without you having a special name in front of your own.
And besides all the above is negated by the fact that if you really want (and have the moneh) you can actually buy datuk-ships anyway -________-
Disclaimer: I’ve met some nice and humble datuks who don’t take advantage of their position so this post is targeted at asshole datuks only wtf.
Anyway blog until headache already.
Lemme post some pics of me and Cheesie in Korea!
Our first meeting in Seoul! Â Outside Doota at Dongdaemun.
Very happy and excited!
So much so that we took over the shoe shop behind us #cryptic
Then I moved in with her.
See how fast our relationship progresses wtf.
No la we were supposed to meet up and stay together planned already hehe.
Liz Lisa look!
I hate Cheesie I’m trying to change style and ditch florals forever but she keeps sucking me in I tell you T__________T
I told her we look like angels in Liz Lisa ponchos I dunno why she laughed so much true what WTF. Â Well she especially does lo so dreamy and serene in this pic.
Subway picture!
(ok headache getting worse wanna finish up fast)
Cheesie calling her friend Scott. Â Who btw is a total asshole -_-
The day I moved in with her, Scott (who was MIA the whole week whenever Cheesie tried calling him) suddenly called and asked us to go do a photoshoot with him.
I didn’t want to cos I didn’t like him already and besides I wanted to go to Myeondong for shopping wtf. Â But Cheesie who is super nice convinced me to meet him and she said his photos are really nice wtf.
So we went lor. Â And when we got to the subway station, we tried calling him and found it was the wrong place -_________- Â Both place names sounded similar so I think we got it messed up.
We had to take a cab and then something like an hour long subway ride before we got to where Scott was waiting.
And we found that he was waiting there for us. Â In his car.
And then after taking photos and all he suggested dinner because he hadn’t eaten all day. Â I wanted to go to Myeondong very badly by then but thought aiya just teman him la since he quite nice take photos for us and all.
So went to eat dinner (this quaint little shop serving something damn good I dunno what it’s called and i don’t have pictures wtf but dinner is not the point)
The point is that after dinner, we called for the bill. Â Cheesie had her wallet out so she paid first. Â I took out my purse…and realized Scott didn’t move a muscle WTF.
So we both paid for his dinner the end wtf.
No acknowledgment no thank you nothing!
Damn angry! Â First of all he asked us out. Â Then we had to take public transport all the way to where he was. Â Nevermind. Â Then pay for his food and he didn’t even offer? Â I have no idea what he was thinking lor maybe he thought he was doing us a favor by doing a photoshoot with us but hello we don’t even need it I would rather go to Myendong *tantrum
Anyway wait for him to send over the pics first then only see.
The place we were at was gorgeous though! Â Again have to wait for his pics before I can post. Â I can’t remember the name but it was at where the Chosun palace was….?
They also eat dogs there đ
Then come home and transform into ghosts FOL.
Last day before we leave! Â It was super warm like 16C.
Cheesie action wanna show how strong she is in the cold wtf.
Last lunch before I leave for airport! Cheesie’s flight was later.
Super stress getting to the airport.
The concierge told me I could take a cab to the bus stop where the airport bus would stop to pick up passengers.
So Cheesie and Donggun (friend of Cheesie’s) came with me to send me off.
And thank god they did cos the fucking bus stop was not where the airport shuttle stopped!! Â The bus that stopped there went to Gimpo (domestic airport) instead of Incheon (international)
Stupid moron concierge! Â I’m clearly a foreigner why would I want to go to Gimpo I want to go out of the country and go home!!! Â Never ask me which airport some more just tell me confidently where the bus stop for Gimpo was and even gave me a map fml.
Luckily Donggun was with us and he made some quick calls in Korean and found out the bus station for Incheon which was like 20 minutes away.
Also my suitcase couldn’t fit into the trunk so the driver put it in the front seat wtf.
He slammed the door shut after it and knocked his hand brake out of position WTF I didn’t know like this also can!
The suitcase was still too big so the door wasn’t shut tight also so Cheesie put her hand outside to hold the door for me I love her T_T
The driver drove on happily oblivious to our fear and discomfort wtf.
At the airport shuttle station!
Hug as though we’re not going to see each other back in KL like that.
Cheesie damn emo cos my flight was earlier so I had to leave her behind for the rest of the day đ
She suddenly grabbed my arm and said “Kajima” which means “don’t go” in Hangeul wtf. Â Um some background: The whole time in Seoul it was pretty easy for us to get around cos all the sales people can apparently speak Japanese so can communicate.
But we still went around spouting random Korean words that friends taught her or that I learned from watching dramas wtf.
So when she said “Kajima” I was dying to say something back in Korean so I shook off  her hand and said “Ahhh shibal” which means f*ck hahahahahaah.
We filmed it *loser. Â Then we laughed so much that Cheesie hit her head on the sofa hahahaahahah.
To any Koreans reading or watching this, sorry for being so rude wtf.
This is the story of one of the greatest battles in my life.
The Battle of the Roach.
T______________________T
Beetles I can take. Â Pick them up and toss them outside no problem. Â Moths just ignore cos they’re pretty. Â Ants can close one eye cos they’re hardworking wtf. Â Mumsy hates ants but how can you kill something who’s working so hard to bring food back to its colony T_T
Even mosquitos just spray some repellant and can relax wtf.
But cockroaches! Â How is it possible to ignore them if you know one is running around your house? Â What if you go to sleep and they shit all over your face WTF.
God I hate cockroaches. Â Why even my first ever blog post here was about cockroaches WTF. (also proof how sad my life was back then wtf)
Seriously even if the world ended, cockroaches would still somehow find a way to survive. Â By clinging to debris and eating poop no doubt.
Source: If Historical Events had Facebook Statuses
Anyway back to the Battle of the Roach.
The other night I was getting ready for bed.. when i spotted a baby cockroach running around on the TV cabinet T__________T (does this mean it has disgusting siblings chilling somewhere too)
I grabbed a paperback and tried to slam it to death.
But it scuttled sneakily UNDER the TV stand, out of my murderous reach.
You know how LCD TVs have a stand to stabilize on? Â Most are made of a huge sheet of glass with some little legs made of cork or rubber or something, about like 5mm thick.
And the damn roach hid in that 5mm of safety.
I tried everything.
I tried using some cardboard to stick under the glass and provoke the roach to run out.
It hid deeper in the middle of the glass FML.
Ugly Cockroach 1, Aud 0.
I tried lifting up the TV.
It was too heavy.
Ugly Cockroach 2, TV 1, Aud 0.
I got Wombeh to stand guard in front of the TV with a book in hand while I tried again to push the cockroach out from behind the TV. Â If it ran out the front, Wombeh would be there to send it to its death wtf.
The cockroach never ran out.
Ugly Cockroach 3, Miserable Aud 0.
Hell would freeze over before I would go to sleep knowing that a cockroach was sharing the room with me.
In the end I lined the edges of the entire TV stand with books to block the cockroach’s escape.
And prayed it would die of suffocation wtf.
The next morning, I woke up and hastily went to check on my hostage.
He was gone T_____________T
And this impressive display of survival skills is what ensures cockroaches will far outlive us. Â Buttfaces.
P/S: In case you’re scrutinizing my books, the one called “Please Daddy No” is not child porn wtf. Â It’s an autobiographical account of a child abuse victim wtf and I got it in some Buy 2 Free 1 deal.
Ok itâs not Santa.
But something nearly as good! And right before Christmas too.
Itâs called Jipaban.
(have a feeling the name came from this song)
And itâs the countryâs first customizable online shopping mall!
Basically Jipaban is a customizable online shopping mall with social networking integration.
This means that there may be hundreds of online stores registered with Jipaban and with their own JPB pages. But depending on your own interests, you can basically add any shops from “Browse all shops” to create your own shopping mall with only items that you like! Or you can browse all items to find your favorite items and then add the shops to your mall. Or! Browse categories if you’re looking for something specific (electronics, toys, clothes, etc)
Means no more walking faster past stores you hate or bore you! Like Mercato I bloody hate Mercato. Or Giordano. Or any sports store.
Ok but in the online context, it just means you donât have to browse any stores that you donât like because you can just keep the ones you do in your mall! Or if you donât like the sellerâs face you can kick them out of your personal mall too.
Perfect for lazy people! Or people whose time is gold ahem. Just drag and drop your favourite stores into your mall!
One of my favourite stores minimaos đ
I adi got the Shelliemay! And the vintage laced shorts đ
Haus of BiB đ Dunno why the two stores I like got same spelling system wan wtf.
Jipaban regulates everything too including payments so you have options for internet banking and paypal.
I also know that they regulate the quality of pictures posted to make sure that customers get the best view of the product they want to buy đ Itâs more likely that you get what you want on Jipaban than anywhere else!
*gasp Hello Kitty case! Too bad I donât have an iPhone 3.
Waiting for them to bring in the iPod Touch 4th gen case… *hints
But if I wanted to ask my friends what they thought about this Hello Kitty or the Duffy costumes on minimaos (!!!), I can add it to my Egg-on List and my friends on Jipaban can tell see and tell me what they think.
Or if Iâm thick skinned enough, or itâs my birthday (4 more months!) I can add it to my Wishlist, and wait for people to buy it for me WTF.
Buy me and Cheesie some shoes please!
Oh yea Imma customize my mall so that every floor has different things *salivates
One floor for clothes.
One floor for shoes.
One floor for books ok I can die happy.
Anyway itâs a month to Christmas now so what better time to get onto Jipaban and buy me your loved ones Xmas presents!
Or or hereâs a good idea! You can buy me something from Jipaban. đ Just a thought wtf.
Okla fine season of giving and all.
If I were to buy a Christmas present on Jipaban, itâd be…
This fucking dumb looking bear hahahahaa from welovecd.com
Heâs actually a set of speakers â see the speaker on his back paw? You can even let him hug your mp3 player while heâs blasting your tunes hahahaha.
Iâd get it for Ooib cos
1) He loves his music. Nobody loves his music as much as Ooib. Whoâs also a total elitist when it comes to music and will only listen to music from the Beatles, um…and other such cool bands whom i donât even know
2) He loves goofy animals like this one! I mean we already have a teddy bear called Lolo whoâs purple and has one eye bigger than the other and we love him so much, so this brown bear with no eyes is a shoo âin for Ooibâs favour wtf.
3) He loves his iPhone and is a total Apple evangelist and the bear looks like heâd hug an iPhone very well
4) He loves his sister nyehehe
5) Iâd call him George. Because he looks like a George and not a John, Paul or Ringo (definitely not a Ringo)
6) He deserves it. I know heâs kinda had a rough time lately so he totally deserves George the ipod hugging bear to sit on his desk and give him goofy looks and play good music for him.
Anyway just write a blog post about why you would love to give this one item from Jipaban (it does not have to be George the Hugging Bear) to someone special. Express yourself and the chosen gift will be sent off to the someone special if you win!
Join Jipabanâs Facebook page or follow them on Twitter @jipaban for more info and start shopping!
Oh ya btw add me on Jipaban thanks wtf đ
So I’ve always narrowed my eyes (and my heart wtf) towards the Kindle and said that Kindle users are all posers and showoffs… and second only to iPad users (sorry mum WTF)
And that having a Kindle sucks because it’s not like you can lend a book you’ve finished to your friend. Â Takkan give your whole Kindle ah. Â And knowledge is supposed to be shared! Â Not kept in a small plastic piece for yourself.
And nothing beats holding the weight of a book in your hands and flipping through real pages! Â Plus I like going back and forth and re-reading parts that were nice before I move on to the next chapter wan wtf. Â And it’s hard to do that with a Kindle.
But then Wombeh gave me his Kindle cos he got a new one as a present.
And…I can basically get any fucking book I want in less than five seconds off Amazon…
I think it’s growing on me.
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